Thursday, October 9, 2008
URGENT RICKI-LEE UPDATE!
5:51PM Jess McGuire | This just in from the MySpazz status and mood feed!
Ricki-Lee is going to be on ACA tonight….in her UNDERWEAR!!!! AAAHHHHHH!!! 5 minutes ago. Mood: ecstatic
GRACIOUS! I’m sure we’ll all be tuning in.
MORE: Ricki-Lee on MySpazz
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Like A Cockroach Of The Airwaves, Alan Jones Will Still Be Broadcasting Long After The Rest Of Humankind Is Dead And Buried
3:43PM Jess McGuire | Alan Jones will never retire – never! Admittedly, the top dog of radio took a break this year to battle prostate cancer, but he’s back and clearly never planning to leave his easily panicked elderly listeners again. He’s just signed another contract with 2GB which will see The Parrot rambling on passionately about anything which tickles his fancy until 2013.
Rumours of Alan Jones’ retirement have been greatly exaggerated, with the prostate cancer survivor today committing to a new deal with 2GB until 2013.
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Stiff Words: ‘Botox? I think it’s fantastic …
2:00PM Kyle Buchanan | Stiff Words: “Botox? I think it’s fantastic and also horrible,” actress Courteney Cox says in the November issue of Marie Claire. “I mean, they’ve come up with this stuff that can make you not look angry. But you have to use it sparingly. I went to this doctor once, and he was like, ‘Oh, let me do it just here and here and here.’ And I was miserable…I mean, I’m an actor, I’ve got to be able to move my face.” Her feet, however, are another story. [Us] More »Madonna Bans Sarah Palin From Concerts; Republican Vice Presidential Candidate Unaware She’d Bought Tickets For Madonna’s Sticky and Sweet Tour
11:39AM Jess McGuire | Pop music’s favourite fifty-year-old maverick Madonna (who, oddly enough, is the former owner of record label Maverick) has spoken out against fellow maverick Sarah Palin during a concert in New Jersey.
Madonna has banned Sarah Palin from attending her concerts, joining stars past and present in dissing the Republican vice-presidential candidate. During the US start of her Sticky and Sweet tour in New Jersey on Saturday night, she shouted: “Sarah Palin can’t come to my party. Sarah Palin can’t come to my show. It’s nothing personal”.
That’s fantastic – it’s nice to see Madge isn’t afraid to get a little mavericky despite her age – except I think banning Sarah Palin from a “party” would only truly be effective if, say, Sarah Palin was actually planning on attending your party. If Sarah Palin had camped overnight for tickets, then dressed up in her finest conically-canned corset, and was happily in the process of handing over her overpriced tickets to the door bitch at the concert when Madonna made the above rant, resulting in the door bitch tearing up the previously valid tickets and calling security to escort a tearful Palin from the venue, then you could say Madge really hit the Republican vice-presidential candidate where it hurt.
But as far as I know, Sarah Palin had no plans to catch Madonna in concert, so it’s kind of a pointless banning, you know? That’s like me organising a housewarming and telling all my friends “If that annoying bitch Katy Perry turns up, I’m totally slamming the door in her clit-teasing face!” – it’s only vaguely interesting for onlookers if there’s an iota of a chance the potential victim will actually show up for their public humiliation.
Oh, and also? Madonna made a joke too. More » 
It’s Official: American Critics Loathe The NBC Version Of Kath & Kim
10:28AM Jess McGuire | We weren’t expecting Australian viewers to find anything lovable about the American remake of beloved ABC-turned-Channel Seven comedy Kath & Kim, but the big question always remained – would NBC viewers actually dig a revamped and relocated version of the show? If the latest reviews are anything to go by, our American cousins are yelling “DO NOT WANT” quite loudly at their television screens.
The American Kath and Kim has been savaged by critics as an embarrassment worthy of an apology to Australia.
Saucer of milk, table two!
Let’s take a look at the cutting commentary regarding the program, eh? More » 
YouTube Clip Of The Day
9:11AM Jess McGuire | Reader Pete sent in the following clip, along with a message saying “OK… so I know the movie mash up trailer thing is not new but you have to check out this one. It is almost flawless!!”
And Pete’s right, folks.
Nicely done! More » 
Baz Luhrmann Ads Propose Australian Tourism as Salve for Shattered American Lives
9:00AM STV | Baz Luhrmann’s boundless ambition may have met its match in a new pair of TV spots commissioned by Tourism Australia, an organisation still reeling from its failure to entice international visitors two years ago with its bikini-clad representative scolding, “Where the bloody hell are you?” This time around, the tourism board opted for the more cheerful specter of an Aboriginal child whose fistful of fairy dust cures everything from burnout to bipolar disorder, all graphically allayed against the backdrop of America’s inclement urban hellholes. Luhrmann’s quick-cut horror show not only disappoints as a short film, but also tosses back in our face all the romantic tourist goodwill he’d accrued through his sweeping Australia trailers — themselves a far more uplifting endorsement of young native kids’ rejuvenating powers, if Nicole Kidman’s burnished features are any indication. Back to the drawing board, Baz! Judge for yourself after the jump. [YouTube] More »
Even Ellen’s Visual Aids Can’t Help Audrina Make Sense of Lauren’s Fling with Justin Bobby
9:00AM Kyle Buchanan | After so many seasons of shared LOLs, the relationship between Hills stars Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge appears to have come to an unfortunate, WTF-tinged end. Rumors are flying that Conrad betrayed her friend by hooking up with Patridge’s vacant, hirsute ex-boyfriend Justin “Bobby” Brescia, and today, Patridge took to the Ellen DeGeneres Show to further fan the flames. A clearly mystified DeGeneres tried to sort out the “who’s zooming who” particulars with the help of some visual aids, but only a Hills aficionado could make sense of a backstory so simultaneously convoluted and uneventful. Still, all the Dermalogica face cleanser in the world can’t hide Patridge’s newfound loneliness. Stay strong, auburn-haired one! [The Ellen DeGeneres Show] More »
Haley Joel Osment Is All Grown Up and Ready to Join the Hitler Youth!
8:50AM Kyle Buchanan | Since 2003, former child star Haley Joel Osment has done most of his acting off-camera, occasionally content to add the occasional videogame voice-over or alcohol-addled car accident to his resume. Recently, though, Osment has reappeared in the public eye, preparing for his Broadway (and cuss word) debut with a vigor that would put even Dakota Fanning 2.0 to shame. Now, Osment shares with MTV the next phase of his career comeback, and it involves the Hitler Youth: More »
