Tuesday, September 30, 2008
White Out (Or Is That In?) At ‘Today Tonight’
2:45PM Clem Bastow | For some time now, the question of who would be taking over hosting duties from Anna “Is She Or Isn’t She Leaving?” Coren on Today Tonight has become as seemingly unlikely to be answered as we once thought “Who shot JR?” or “Who is Keyser Soze?” were. Well, wonder no longer, as Seven have finally decided upon a replacement for the outgoing serious journalist – step up to the plate, Matthew White!
White started his career at The Manly Daily before presenting breakfast news on Newcastle radio and moving into television, starting at Seven four years ago.
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Let’s Discuss Lady GaGa’s Performance On Rove, Shall We?
1:36PM Jess McGuire | If you watched Rove on Sunday night – AND WHY WOULDN’T YOU, THE BOY NEXT DOOR HAS WON THE HEART OF THE NATION, GOOD ENOUGH FOR KEVIN RUDD, ETC! – you would have seen both unfunny comedian Dane Cook (seriously, nothing he said, nothing, made me even smile. And I wasn’t planning on being a hater! Also, there’s this which kinda cements him as a fool in my mind) and new pop sensation Lady GaGa.
Now, I love pop. So does Bastow. If you haven’t picked up on that during your time on Defamer Australia, then let me hammer it home. Me and Pop used to fool around as kids. There was a brief period in high school where I didn’t want to be seen anywhere near Pop, and then once I stopped caring about what other people thought of me, I realised that what me and Pop had was something special, you know? And sometimes we see other people, and sometimes I look at some of the folks associated with Pop and think “What are you doing?! They don’t deserve to be linked to you! They’re bringing you down, ruining your rep!” but Pop has a mind of its own and I have to respect that. Nay, I have to love that. And I do.
So I wanted to LOVE Lady GaGa’s appearance on Rove. I do like ‘Just Dance’ as a song, truly (although I prefer the sheer awesomeness and enthusiasm of Ladyhawke, or the shameless feel good hook-heavy Danish stylings of Alphabeat) but I was completely underwhelmed by her performance on Sunday night. Her pretentiousness during the interview before hitting the stage was almost adorable, but not quite. And then there was the performance itself… More » New Idea’s Boom Year Continues As Demi Moore Sues
1:30PM Clem Bastow | In case you’ve forgotten, when it comes to “two thousand and great”, the only person or thing whose annus horribilis has rivalled that of Channel Nine has been beleaguered women’s rag, New Idea. From dodgy deals to paying alleged domestic abusers to spill their guts to “accidentally” breaking Palace embargos (and that’s just the stuff that was actually in the mag, they’ve had plenty of strife behind the scenes), it hasn’t exactly been a red letter year for the mag. Well, as Queer Eye told us, all things just keep getting better, and now Demi Moore is suing New Idea after they allegedly printed photos from a private party without permission. Bonus!
In a statement of claim filed with the Federal Court last week, Moore claimed New Idea infringed her copyright over the pictures when it put them on the cover of its March 8 edition and across two pages inside the magazine.
Australian Idol Round-Up: For Once, The Nation Gets It Right!
11:30AM Clem Bastow | Remember, back in the olden times of Australian Idol, when the better contestants would be sent packing, while the cute but tuneless teens’ choices overstayed their welcome by weeks? Now, I don’t want to jinx anything, but I think we may have reached a point where Australian Idol voters have actually grown a clue or two: to wit, it’s time to go, Tom Williams! Yes, the tone-deaf teen whose voice may not have actually broken yet will be spared from Matt Corby-esque women’s-nightie-and-fedora wardrobe choices in future episodes, as he’s been sent packing, no doubt with a bumper pack of Kleenex in hand:
For the second week in a row a teenager left Australian Idol in tears with 16-year-old Tom Williams being shown the door last night.
More » Kylie Is Planning On Appearing In A Puntastic Musical Penned By Kathy Lette… Wait, What?
11:26AM Jess McGuire | Could it be true? Is Australia’s very own princess, Ms Kylie Minogue, actually planning on appearing in a musical which features all of her greatest hits? Isn’t that just called a “concert”, if you’re a pop star? And is Kathy Lette, the author who never met a play on words she didn’t like – and then go on to drunkenly grope in the bathroom whilst Shazza and the other moles drank all the Breezers and tried to impress Bazza and Nicko and the rest of the footy players by showing off their tan lines, etc – really going to be writing it?
ARGHHHHHHHHHHH! APPARENTLY!
Kylie Minogue has reportedly set her sights on the West End. The ex-neighbours actress turned multi award-winning singer-songwriter is apparently working on a jukebox musical based around some of her greatest hits.
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This Video Is Quite Brilliant, And Also SFW
10:30AM Jess McGuire | I don’t know how many of you are aware of a little thing called SFW Porn. Essentially, images from pornographic videos are meddled with in Photoshop until they look innocent, even though, you know, they’re really not.
So when my friend Matty sent me the following “SFW Porn”, I roared with laughter and also, felt ever so slightly dirty.
Here’s a “SFW” still from the video, and if you want to see the whole thing and you’re not worried about getting in trouble from people who are likely to get offended by rude bits even if they are covered up by a strategically placed cartoon koala, you can take a look at the clip after the jump.
More » Lily Allen Is Feeling Cheery!
9:50AM Jess McGuire | When we last popped over to pop star and errant awards ceremony host Lily Allen’s MySpazz blog, she was heading out to get a colonic irrigation. The perfect cure for any Large Hadron Collider fears one might be “internalising”!
In her latest post for online pals, she reveals she’s happy, she can’t wait for this year to be over (you can’t blame her, all things considered – I’m personally completely with her on that one. Two thousand and hate can go and fist itself into oblivion, I’m hankering already for two thousand and fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine), and guess which one of the Kings Of Leon she’s got the lady-horn for? Oh! And there’s a dollop of opinion when it comes to US politics too!
I’m off to paris for the weekend, so excited. I love paris, and the sun is shining, it’s going to be beautiful, im gonna listen to Kings of leon ,TV on the radio and the new Roots Manuva album on the plane.
More » Brooke Hogan On Lesbianism and The Worrying Lack Of Puppies On The Nightly News
9:15AM Jess McGuire | Hulk Hogan’s daughter Brooke has been appearing on Defamer a fair bit lately. She’s revealed her almost adorable ignorance when it comes to US politics (”Who is this Palin you speak of? Vice President of wha? THERE’S TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THE WHITEHOUSE!”) and, in doing so, somehow wormed her way into the strange and slightly diseased part of my heart where affection for borderline retarded Z-grade celebrities slowly festers.
So you can just imagine how happy it made me to wake up this morning and learn that Brooke has kept that mouth a-flappin’ and absolutely nothing of worth has been spewed forth. And personally, I am pretty much all about worthless soundbites.
Brooke, explain the concept of lesbianism to the world!
The “Brooke Knows Best” babe was overheard complaining about her love life — or lack thereof — last Monday night when she hosted an anniversary celebration at Bowlmor Lanes’ southern outpost, STRIKE Miami.
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Barbara Walters Thinks A Fiery Elisabeth Hasselback Needs ‘Cooling Off’ Time
8:40AM Kyle Buchanan | With the rumour mill buzzing that a discontent Elisabeth Hasselbeck may vacate her cushiony seat on The View for the cool, hard Eames chair of Fox News, it’s up to den mother Barbara Walters to restore order on the set of her chat show. True to form, Walters has eschewed hugging it out in favour of a more clinical approach; according to the Chicago Sun-Times, she’s had to schedule a staff meeting to deal with the increasingly hot-under-the-collar Hasselbeck:
