RSS Feeds
Stephanie Rice For Prime Minister! Aussie Aussie Aussie! Etc!
Posted by Jess McGuire at 4:26 PM on August 13, 2008
At this point, my former nemesis Stephanie Rice could use her time in the pool to simply do a poo, and I for one would stick a flag in it, salute, and begin belting out "We are one, but we are maaaaaaaaaaany..." and encouraging others to follow suit.
IT'S GOLD AGAIN FOR STEPHANIE!
A touch over two years ago, nobody outside of swimming circles, her family and friends, and maybe those on Facebook, knew anything about Stephanie Rice. Today, among a women's team of superstars, she is the Australian golden girl, claiming her second Olympic gold medal.
It was just 29 months ago that Rice broke onto the Australian landscape when she starred at the Melbourne Commonwealth Games. Since then she has produced stirring performances at the world titles the following year, world records at the trials in March, and now, the ultimate, golden Olympic souvenirs.
In one of the better races of the Games, a thrilling stroke for stroke battle with Zimbabwean Kirsty Coventry, Rice just managed to overhaul her tenacious rival right on the wall, and win by the bare margin of 0.13s.
Stephanie, I have not only stopped being angry about you appearing in every single paper and magazine I picked up over the past few weeks, but I now actively encourage you to whore yourself out to every single media organisation you can upon your return from Beijing. Tell me your favourite recipe in That's Life! Get your medal-winning norgs out in FHM and Zoo Weekly! Show New Idea around your home, and goddamn it, let Andrew Bolt use your Olympic victory as inspiration for a three thousand word essay explaining how you are actually George W. Bush and how your win is actually a metaphor as to why invading Iraq was a bloody brilliant idea!
It's all good, because I've gone simply MAD for Rice.
(Unless you lose a really easy race or something. Are you swimming again? I don't really know. I'm barely following the Games, but I know I like to see a winner on my news website's front page when I hit the interwebs...)
Comments
There are currently no AU comments for this post.