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Shia LaBeouf Has More Talent In His Little Finger Than Most Have In Their Whole Body; Unfortunately, They're Cutting It Off
Posted by Seth at 8:07 AM on August 7, 2008
There's really no gentle way to put his, so we'll just cede the podium to Star magazine for the latest news involving Shia LaBeouf's injured hand:<
Doctors have told Shia LaBeouf they may have to amputate one of his injured fingers, Star has learned exclusively.
The young star, now working on Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is likely to lose the pinky on his left hand, a source on the movie set says.
"Shia called producers yesterday and told them," the source on the set in Alamogordo, N.M. says. "It's really thrown the movie into turmoil."
We love how the source is big enough to see this digit-loss tragedy from multiple points of view, including the logistical nightmare it presents for Transformers 2's continuity editors. If CGI can turn an 18-wheeler into a walking, talking robot, however, and return the rainforest to Sienna Miller's Brazilian, we're confident little digital appendages can also be achieved. Seriously, though, Shia—sorry, man. That sucks. But we'll still be happy to pay the $9 bucks—one per finger!—it costs to check out Fallen at the Vista on opening weekend.
Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
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Huge Tracts of Land
Posted 8:41 AM 7/8/08
He should just chop off the whole hand, and go Buster Bluth style
Huge Tracts of Land
bess marvin, girl detective
Posted 8:35 AM 7/8/08
@Losin_it: he is not worthy of my love, but he is worthy of my lust. i want to sit on his face. that's all.
@Seth: I don't know. I just can't put my finger on it...HEY-YO! I will be here all night folks. Try to the finger foods. Except you Shia!*
*I'm horrible.
bess marvin, girl detective
dietcock
Posted 8:34 AM 7/8/08
If you really must know, in classic Japanese tradition, the pinky is being cut off to settle a Yakuza debt of honor. He shamed himself by sucking so bad in "Indy 4" that he made ShortRound look like a good sidekick by way of comparison.
dietcock
NoWireHangers
Posted 8:32 AM 7/8/08
@WGARefugee: Jinx!
NoWireHangers
Losin_it
Posted 8:32 AM 7/8/08
@WGARefugee: That looks like a penis with a toenail.
How much?
Losin_it
EuroDad
Posted 8:31 AM 7/8/08
perhaps there was a miscommunication and it's actually his WINKY that's on the chopping block?
EuroDad
metroville
Posted 8:31 AM 7/8/08
Ehren Kruger is already brainstorming a production rewrite wherein Blaster's malfunctioning "eject" button leads to the tragic loss of Sam Witwicky's pinky. Either that or John Turturro bites it off.
metroville
NoWireHangers
Posted 8:30 AM 7/8/08
I just pray some good comes out of this and he auctions off the gangrened nub to the highest bidder.
NoWireHangers
WGARefugee
Posted 8:30 AM 7/8/08
I'm putting this baby on Ebay right now!! I'm rich, I'm r-i-c-h!!!
WGARefugee
Seth
Posted 8:28 AM 7/8/08
@bess marvin, girl detective: What's the big deal? Nine-fingered guys are hot.
Seth
Losin_it
Posted 8:25 AM 7/8/08
I can't make myself believe that Shia could actually be worthy of Bess Marvin, Girl Detective.
Losin_it
ColbertNation
Posted 8:23 AM 7/8/08
Well, that's his career over. No one will pay to see a nine fingered freak. By the way - FREAK!! LOOK AT THE FREAK!!
ColbertNation
Cacafuego
Posted 8:23 AM 7/8/08
If he's lost the ability to bend his pinky, the docs may have no choice but to amputate. My dad had the same thing happen to him when he got his hand crushed in a farming accident. They were able to rebuild his hand, but for the pinky--it refused to bend. He opted to have it amputated rather than rebuild it only to get the pinky ripped off by something metal, since he was also the mechanic who repaired the farm machinery. Up until I was 5, I thought all adult men (or at least the real ones) only had 9 fingers.
Cacafuego
bess marvin, girl detective
Posted 8:21 AM 7/8/08
can i truly lust after a man with nine fingers? if this story is true, time will tell.
bess marvin, girl detective
TexasCrude
Posted 8:21 AM 7/8/08
In a story that is totally true and not at all fabricated by Star Magazine.
You willing to pinky swear on it? (I know, hush. too rich)
TexasCrude
Losin_it
Posted 8:16 AM 7/8/08
I hope it's not his middle finger-- how is he going to wave goodbye to the paps?
Losin_it
RocketRockit
Posted 8:16 AM 7/8/08
I call BS. If you look at the pictures of him from the hospital, the fucking pinky is the only one that looks okay.
RocketRockit
Richard
Posted 8:15 AM 7/8/08
MONSTER!!!!
Richard
tunamelt
Posted 9:05 AM 7/8/08
This needs some kind of graphic, like SHIA AMPUTATION WATCH with a flashing siren.
tunamelt
tunamelt
Posted 9:04 AM 7/8/08
NOOO!
tunamelt
Huge Tracts of Land
Posted 9:03 AM 7/8/08
@Juancho:
Huge Tracts of Land
kookla
Posted 8:59 AM 7/8/08
I can't wait to hear Shia's funny anecdote about his amputation on David Letterman.
kookla
Juancho
Posted 8:49 AM 7/8/08
@Huge Tracts of Land: He's a monster. A MONSTER.
Juancho
WGARefugee
Posted 8:43 AM 7/8/08
@Losin_it: Well they cost me $19.95 but I'll sell the first 100 genuine Shia LaBeouf amputated fingers on Ebay for a buy it now price of only $999.
WGARefugee
Shumina
Posted 9:26 AM 7/8/08
"thrown the movie into turmoil."
...uh, WHAT? You can CGI nine thousand planes, trains, and automobiles and you can't CGI a pinky?! Weak.
Shumina
NoWireHangers
Posted 9:26 AM 7/8/08
He can get a tiny hook for his nub. Nothing says street cred like a tiny hook.
NoWireHangers
jasonelias
Posted 9:16 AM 7/8/08
@kookla: "Pinky amputation is a formidable foe..."
jasonelias
everfade
Posted 9:10 AM 7/8/08
I'd still do him, even with only nine fingers. Its not the fingers Im after hehehe
*dirty*
everfade
hughman
Posted 9:48 AM 7/8/08
if he gets his pinky amputated, what will he hold loftily when holding his bong? what would miss manners say?
hughman
Old No.7
Posted 11:10 AM 7/8/08
@Losin_it: Or fingerbang some other guy's girl with?
Old No.7
Mel Gibstein
Posted 11:06 AM 7/8/08
Finger? I can get you a finger. I can get you a finger by...three o'clock. With nail polish. Fuckin amateurs.
Mel Gibstein
rtisovec
Posted 11:38 AM 7/8/08
Shia's finger is getting more post Indy news than short round ever got.
rtisovec
mr hotpants
Posted 1:30 PM 7/8/08
doesnt darryl hannah have some sort of half-finger? maybe they could date...
mr hotpants
Losin_it
Posted 2:04 PM 7/8/08
@Old No.7: It depends. For exmaple, some girls find my personal fingers acceptable, while others what stunt-fingers called in to get the job done.
Losin_it
Mephisto_Bonk
Posted 2:15 PM 7/8/08
@Old No.7: @Old No.7: I understand that Zac Efron was "crushed" at the news - apparently no one scratched Zackie's "special itch" better than Shia wielding that selfsame pinky.....
Mephisto_Bonk
mcbeachy
Posted 4:33 PM 7/8/08
Doesn't Matthew Perry have a half finger? I could swear I was just reading about some actor with a half finger. (God knows why.)
Not to mention Jerry Garcia.
mcbeachy
Baronzemo
Posted 5:06 PM 7/8/08
mcbeachy; Gary Burghoff? Harold Lloyd?
Baronzemo
TheQuestion
Posted 1:24 AM 8/8/08
I can't believe we're spending this much time on info gathered from the Star. I call b.s., the tv entertainment shows would be all over this if it was true.
TheQuestion
Victor Ward
Posted 2:40 AM 8/8/08
Well, at least we know who'll take over Gwyneth's role, should they ever re-make The Royal Tenenbaums.
Victor Ward
Little Mintz Sunshine
Posted 3:57 AM 8/8/08
Still, if you're going to lose a digit, I don't think you could do better than losing what amounts to the appendix of fingers....
Little Mintz Sunshine
wharfrat
Posted 3:48 AM 8/8/08
"Shia LaBeouf is Jerry Garcia"
wharfrat
mcbeachy
Posted 4:32 AM 8/8/08
@wharfrat: Now there's a part to gain weight for! He'd have to work on the facial hair, though.
mcbeachy
mcbeachy
Posted 4:29 AM 8/8/08
@Baronzemo: I feel like it was someone hunkier, but from the 40s-50s era of films. I remember reading how he took pains to be shot from certain angles so his hand wouldn't show the missing finger.
Boy I'm hoping I didn't dream all that. I have a fertile dream life.
mcbeachy