Sarandon’s Trail (Mix) of Terror: Scurrilous pinko firebrand Susan Sarandon was reportedly implicated over the weekend in a sweep by authoriities at the All Points West music and arts festival in Jersey City, N.J. A witness on the scene at Liberty State Park described the Academy Award-winning actress as being on line treacherously laying in wait with husband and accomplice Tim Robbins when — and we quote — “security guards confiscat[ed] trail mix from [her] purse while she waited in the VIP line.” Sarandon was said to have then escaped with Robbins into the maw of the crowd, which closed in solidarity behind her as headliner Jack Johnson strummed a mellow plea for her pursuers to let her go. She remains at large, travelling between New York and LA; you are urged to notify police immediately if you see her and/or her trail mix in public. [NYP]