1988 Oscars Number Held In Suspicion Of Multiple Career Killings

A recently unearthed artifact from 1988 offers a mass celebrity humiliation on a scale so staggering, the mind quite simply reels. The setting was that year’s Academy Awards ceremony—and what better way to celebrate the most glamorous evening in entertainment that with a nine-minute-long musical number peopled by Hollywood’s “brightest young stars,” in which they express through singing, dancing, fencing, and moonwalking their, um, desire to become a “super duper pooper scooper” Oscar winner.

Along this journey through Satan’s lower colon, you’ll spot some recognisable faces— Blair Underwood, Christian Slater, McDreamy, Ricki Lake, Chad Lowe, and Corey Feldman, whose bedroom walls we can only imagine were covered in “Bad” posters at the time. You’ll also spot some lesser-knowns: Keith “Adventures in Babysitting” Coogan, Melora “Jan from The Office” Hardin, Carrie “Carol Burnett’s deceased daughter” Hamilton, plus an elegant pas de deux featuring Tracy “Ricky’s daughter/Seinfeld’s twin” Nelson and someone by the name of D.A. Pauley. Have we sold this yet? Did we mention Feldman gets a dance solo at the 4:45 mark? Enjoy.

Comments (AU Comments | US Comments)

  • WatTooSoon

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Leviticus_71

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • WatTooSoon

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Baronzemo

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Scout 3.0

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • RocketRockit

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Mymoustache

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • mcgeorge

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • psych101

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • UnindictedCo-conspirator

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • NoWireHangers

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • taraniso

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • taraniso

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • kookla

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • jwick25

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • TurdBlossom

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • bess marvin, girl detective

    further proof that coke (especially in the 1980s) was a hell of a drug.

    bess marvin, girl detective

  • Nomi Malone

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Little Mintz Sunshine

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • metroville

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • JohnD

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Greasy Thumb Guzik

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • dinalohan

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Mr-Busy

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Mr-Busy

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Mr-Busy

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Sean

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • gadge

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • JohnD

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • DrAftershave

    hmm...i remember watching this as a kid live on the air, then only a couple of months later, i was put in the psych ward for "treatment". coincidence?

    DrAftershave

  • Decebal

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Fry_Bread_Power

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Desk_hack

    *weeps into blanket*

    Make it stop! Make it stop!

    Desk_hack

  • whitiris

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Calraigh

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • larala

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • FuryOfFirestorm

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Dimo

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • kbath10100

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • RocketRockit

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • TillieHarper

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • kityglitr

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Mr-Busy

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • Fama Est

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • SeaPeople

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • diablocody

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • GuyBitchy

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • kbutterum

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • kbutterum

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

  • kbutterum

    Maybe his shirt should have read,

Post Your Comments

Got something to say? There are two ways to comment:

1. Guests

Click here to comment instantly.

2. Facebook Users

Click below to comment using your Facebook account.

We're looking for comments that are interesting, substantial or highly amusing. If your comments are excessively self-promotional, obnoxious, or even worse, boring, you will be banned from commenting. All comments are moderated.