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'Nine' Now Literally Stars Everyone With Addition Of Fergie
Posted by Seth at 7:40 AM on July 22, 2008
· Fergie has joined the ever-growing cast of the Weinstein Co.'s Nine. In her first role in a major motion picture, she'll play "Saraghina, a lusty woman who introduces [Daniel Day-Lewis's character] to the world of sexuality" by lowering her drawbridge, extending a long straw, and sucking down the frothy contents of his simmering desire. In some ways you could almost say that she'll drink his manshake—she'll drink it up! (Forgive us.) [Variety]
· Mad Men endured another critic-derived facial, being named TCA's program of the year, best new program, and best drama. [Variety]
· British actor James Purefoy close to signing on as the lead in The Philanthropist, an NBC series about "a renegade billionaire who uses his wealth to help people in need no matter the risks or costs" that's loosely based on Donald Trump's life. [THR]
· Selma Blair's new sitcom Kath & Kim will take 30 Rock's 8:30 p.m. Thursday slot, with 30 Rock pitching camp in the far MILF-friendlier environment of 9:30. [THR]
· High School Musical: Get in the Picture underperformed for ABC, curtailing that network's plans for spinoffs High School Musical: My First Internet Photoscandal and Being Miley: The Search for America's Next Virgin Slut. [Variety]
Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
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Huge Tracts of Land
Posted 8:27 AM 22/7/08
@mothrafairy: I was just watching the Fellini doc "I'm a Born Liar" the other day. If it's a proper homage it would be awesome to see Fergie gain 300 pounds for this!
Huge Tracts of Land
Assistant/Atlas
Posted 8:25 AM 22/7/08
Oh sweet Jesus, some get Weinstein a Twinkie because he's not thinking clearly. Fergie in a movie? That's their worst decision since spending $100 million for a Rose McGowan vehicle.
@RocketRockit: That sounds delicious. But again, if only Fergie wasn't involved.
Assistant/Atlas
mothrafairy
Posted 8:21 AM 22/7/08
Whull. A genuine Fellini "homage"! Saraghina was the fabulous (and large) beach-dwelling whore of Federico's youthful fanatsies in the classic movie 8 & 1/2.
+ Watch video
mothrafairy
kookla
Posted 8:20 AM 22/7/08
Oh great. Because you know when Daniel Day Lewis comes around, Fergie's "London bridge" is totally gonna wanna go down.
kookla
RocketRockit
Posted 8:09 AM 22/7/08
I love "Saraghina." It's so "sangria" meets "vagina." Perfect!!
RocketRockit
Huge Tracts of Land
Posted 8:01 AM 22/7/08
Oscar-award winning artist to waste his time (and ours) by having to share oxygen with one of mankind's most pointless waste of boobs and internal organs. Cue rip in space/time continuum.
Also, remember when she peed her pants on stage? I had to bring that up. Today. Again.
Huge Tracts of Land
NoWireHangers
Posted 7:54 AM 22/7/08
Forgive you? That was delightful, Seth.
Oh, that Fergie. I remember watching Idol Gives Back (yeah, yeah). Heart is tearing through Barracuda and my heart swells with pride for badass women. Then Fergie skips on stage half naked and starts doing one-armed cartwheels. I would have donated money for Ann Wilson to trip her.
NoWireHangers
raincoaster
Posted 8:58 AM 22/7/08
Seth, I can always tell it's your post without checking the name. Beautiful.
raincoaster
mothrafairy
Posted 9:26 AM 22/7/08
@Huge Tracts of Land:
I'd pay to see Fergie hog-up, but even then she would never be one-tenth as talented as the original 'Saraghina'--one of Fellini's classic Psycho-Chicks, don't you think?
Now, I must go and watch Alanis's "My Humps" parody to de-Fergie my brain.
mothrafairy
thejoyofsound
Posted 9:54 AM 22/7/08
@Assistant/Atlas: Yes, Fergie in a movie is bad but Fergie in a movie with Daniel Day-Lewis?? WTF IS THAT!?!?
Hey, I've got a good idea! Let's put Christina Aguilera in a movie with Geoffrey Rush next! After that, we can pair up Ralph Feinnes with that gal from The Pussycat Dolls!
thejoyofsound
kookla
Posted 10:23 AM 22/7/08
@Huge Tracts of Land: Not to mention Ralph and that Quantas stewardess he joined the mile high club with. Actually Ralph and Fergie would be perfect.
kookla
Huge Tracts of Land
Posted 10:20 AM 22/7/08
@thejoyofsound: Ralph Fiennes already had to do hard time with a talentless strumpet in the pootacular Maid in Manhattan!
Huge Tracts of Land
thejoyofsound
Posted 10:53 AM 22/7/08
@Huge Tracts of Land: @kookla: Oh snap!
It all just makes my heart and my head hurt way too much.
thejoyofsound
Wendy_Kroy
Posted 11:24 AM 22/7/08
I liked James Purefoy a lot in Rome, but I'm not sure I'll be as enamored of him if he keeps his clothes on. Unless you think the new series will show the renegade billionaire being toweled down after he gets out of a bath, too?
Mmmm, Antony...
Wendy_Kroy