Lindsay Lohan's New Fashion Line Handily Equipped With Kneepads For Fellow BJ Queens!
Posted by Molly Friedman at 5:05 AM on July 15, 2008
As with any story involving Lindsay Lohan, we have good and bad news to report. We noted back in March that the queen of all things Lesbian Chic would finally follow in every other bored starlet's wobbly footsteps and design a clothing line. And, being the non-traditionalist that she is, Lohan intended on sticking to leggings. Which made sense, considering the practical usage of leggings when taking a walk of shame, in need of a secure and moisture-proof hiding place for substances, and stretching out one's legs while passed out in SUVs. And leave it to Lindsay to turn the otherwise boring piece of clothing into a racy collection of pieces custom-made for any girl looking for a comfy place to rest her knees mid-blow job. Not to mention a surefire way to slip on a pair of "ankle gloves" and alert every male within 30 miles just how eager you are to spread said ankles:

The starry-eyed Kitson wannabe Intuition, who assures online shoppers they cater "to celebrities and Hollywood wives" in case you were worried, has an exclusive first look at Lindsay's highly anticipated leggings line, and the rumoured public blow job volunteer has delivered a mini-preview that does not disappoint. In another apparent homage to her (yes, we get it already) icon Marilyn Monroe, the entire collection is called "6126," Monroe's birthday, and one standout pair is named the "Mr. President Leggings," an eyesore that comes with built-in knee pads. Get it?! Like, when you're doing a striptease and croaking out "Happy Birthday, Mr. President" to your nearly unconscious beau of the moment, a mere $132 will ensure a blurry morning after without any pesky knee scrapes for once!
[Photo credits: Shop Intuition]
- ROD TOWNSEND [Rod Townsend]

Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
There are currently no AU comments for this post.
NoGrumpys
Posted 6:18 AM 15/7/08
wake me when there is a gay version...
oh never mind - its called a foolball uniform
NoGrumpys
Huge Tracts of Land
Posted 6:02 AM 15/7/08
I don't get the leopard print what-have-yous at all. So this is for when your ankles are cold, but not your toes, and just the lower part of your calves, but not your upper calves.
Huge Tracts of Land
Breadbowl
Posted 5:53 AM 15/7/08
When I read "knee pads" and "Mr. President" I think Lewinsky..
Breadbowl
TurdBlossom
Posted 5:51 AM 15/7/08
The name Lohan has become synonymous with class, hasn't it?
TurdBlossom
Old No.7
Posted 5:50 AM 15/7/08
In the good ol' days, we just made the whore sew an "A" on her blouse.
Old No.7
SaphocratSam
Posted 9:19 AM 15/7/08
@Old No.7: hahahaha. hawthorne lives on!
SaphocratSam
rtisovec
Posted 9:36 AM 15/7/08
Do you wear the knee pads over or under the coke pants?
I'm personally looking for her firecrotch tampon line (made of asbestos)
rtisovec
DrAftershave
Posted 10:04 AM 15/7/08
this just screams "inspired by coke binge". who would even- oh, wait. never mind.
DrAftershave
Assistant/Atlas
Posted 10:28 AM 15/7/08
Wha? ... I just....she makes it too easy.
Assistant/Atlas
raincoaster
Posted 11:02 AM 15/7/08
I've seen these leggings up close, and they are gawdawful, every one of the damn things. The spray-painted stretch lame is positively psychosis-inducing.
raincoaster
friendslikeJimRome
Posted 11:38 PM 15/7/08
Laugh if you want, but I'm buying a bottle of champagne for any female who shows up at a club with "Mr President leggings".
friendslikeJimRome