July 19, 2008

 

There Are Many Comedy Persons, But Only One Comedy Person Of The Year: Judd Apatow

Posted by Seth at 11:00 AM on July 19, 2008

We return you now to the Just For Laughs Festival in Montreal—a city reinvigorated by a strengthened Canadian dollar and the recent grand opening of The Celine Dion Jumpsuit and Châpeau Museum. Hours ago, comedy tycoon (we promised we wouldn't call him a monopolist) Judd Apatow picked up a handsome companion trophy to sit alongside his Flackie and prized collection of custom penis-molds of every actor he's ever worked with: The prestigious Just For Laughs First Annual Comedy Person of the Year award.

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The Real Reason Penelope Cruz Can't Keep A Man: 'When She Takes Off Her Blouse, It's The Least Sexual Moment In History'

Posted by Molly Friedman at 10:40 AM on July 19, 2008

In the latest issue of W, cover girl Penelope Cruz assures the reporter that she "never talk[s] about her private life to journalists...NEVER," Of course, a few grafs above, the pretty little beard-candy spends much of the interview talking, in great detail, about the most private of private issues we didn't even know we wanted to know! Penelope's "inner monsters" that have ruined her so-called relationships, why "sweating and bleeding" is her idea of "happiness," and far more after the jump:

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Did the 'Extra' Jinx Finally Catch Up With Sarah Silverman?

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 9:50 AM on July 19, 2008

If you haven't yet done so this summer, there's no time like the present to pack a few bottles, grab a blanket and head down to park for some fresh air and a picnic. And nothing quite hits the spot like a lovely Dirt Sandwich, bringing you all the cool, replenishing nutrients of the week that was in entertainment news. You could people-watch, we suppose, but face it: The exploits of cursed Sarah Silverman, shirtless Mormon missionaries, "double-dissed" Jon Voight, Miley-courting Coldplay and bad-art magnet Howie Mandel (among other too numerous to mention) just yield too much week—ending deliciousness to pass up. So indulge! Resident culinary genius and Defamer videographer Molly McAleer can always make more!

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Wanna Become A Member Of Hot Young Hollywood? Take Your Top Off Already!

Posted by Molly Friedman at 9:20 AM on July 19, 2008

So earlier this week we suggested tween queen of homemade kiddie porn Miley Cyrus just may have been inspired by a former teen queen of homemade, visually intoxicated porn. And, sordid as it may be, much of the Hannah Montana star's fame outside of the flyover states is quite possibly due to all those "scandalous" photos that keep popping up. Which is a good thing in the world of "All press is...", right? And here to provide some guidance in answering that question are established troublemaker and pot princess Mischa Barton and future troublemaker Hayden Panettiere.

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Rock-Bottom Coreys: Five Classic Low Points From the Haim/Feldman Tradition

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 9:00 AM on July 19, 2008

From full-page "hire-me" ads to shill-tastic film-festival crashing, we've recently observed the trajectory of Corey Feldman and Corey Haim's relationship with us and each other taking an unusual U-shape. The nadir (we think) appears in this sneak-peek of Sunday's The Two Coreys when, in a testament to love and tone-deafness, Feldman serenaded his wife Susie with a little string-accompanied tune you can hear after the jump. Then join us in comparing and contrasting Feldman's Otis-Redding-by-way-of-chainsaw delivery with a few of the duo's other travails captured here diligently in recent months. Where will it end? Or, more to the point: Will it end?

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Santa Monica To Paris: 'Glow' Will Prove Who the Real City of Light Is

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 8:00 AM on July 19, 2008

The beach will literally glow this weekend in Santa Monica, as the city launches its first-ever light installation / art festival. While it may be true that they got the idea from the Parisian art festival Nuit Blanche, which goes on all night once a year, this is the first all-night, light-based interactive art fest that's being held in our country. Dubbed Glow, after the iridescent grunion in the ocean, the fest is an all-night psychedelic light party that starts at 7 p.m. Saturday night and goes till 7 in the morning. Bring your one-hitter for maximum amplification.

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'Maxim' Editors Suddenly Have 'Crush' On Sarah Jessica Parker, Their Former Pick For 'Unsexiest Broad Alive'

Posted by Molly Friedman at 7:40 AM on July 19, 2008

Was Sarah Jessica Parker's mole removal so effective in the sexiness department that the simple laser treatment managed to majorly tighten the trousers of all those T&A experts at Maxim? As we noted this week, SJP found herself caught up in a mystery-laden MoleGate, in which her immortal beauty mark suddenly disappeared. Some (guilty as charged) played the optimist by suggesting the once-highly noticeable imperfection had simply been disguised by some genius makeup artist — but just one day later, her rep confirmed that the SATC star did go under the laser simply because "she was in the mood."

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Harvey Weinstein Offers Rare, Brief Tour of Where His Movies Go to Die

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:20 AM on July 19, 2008

What will the world do when it no longer has Harvey Weinstein to kick around any longer? This isn't a rhetorical question, either — at least it doesn't feel that way after the latest in a growing stack of Weinstein Company pre-mortems hit the trades over the last 24 hours. BusinessWeek was first with a relatively tame primer on TWC's flagging slate, including Bob Weinstein's prediction that the $171,000-grossing John C. Reilly comedy The Promotion "may make us a few bucks" when the dust settles on home video. No rush, Bob — Wall Street and your 21-cent Genius Products shares can wait.

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Posted by Seth at 6:41 AM on July 19, 2008

Harrison Ford better keep one eye over his shoulder if he doesn't want to see his title of Hollywood's Most Constipated-Looking Leading Man slip through his fingers. Using a series of stills from Vantage Point, the Not-So-Exciting Life of Brian Palmer blog makes the compelling case that Dennis Quaid is really doing the most exciting work today in the realm of making-number-two-faces. [brianmpalmer.com]

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'10,' 'Valley Girl' Lead Charge as Terrifying Remake Fever Grips Hollywood

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 6:20 AM on July 19, 2008

Because the week wasn't ruined enough with RoboCop news and word of Gene Simmons judging ad jingles, the End of Ideas caravan rolls on today with not one, not two but three whole fucking remake concepts for us to dread — none more irritating than Hyde Park's reimagining of Blake Edwards's classic 10. It's not that the Dudley Moore/Bo Derek comedy is untouchable, but at least Edwards doesn't have hold it down while the new producers rape it:

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'Dark Knight' Made More Money At Midnight Than 'Meet Dave' Will Make In 400 Years

Posted by Seth at 6:01 AM on July 19, 2008

· This weekend's Gay Man's Moviegoing Dilemma (hmm...Meryl Streep and the hook from Madonna's "Hung Up," or Christian Bale shirtless...hmmmmmmm) could end up benefiting everyone, as the weekend is poised to shatter box office records. The Dark Knight already broke the one for midnight screenings. [Variety, Variety]
· Regency TV—the small TV studio launched a decade ago that brought you Malcolm in the Middle and The Bernie Mac Show—is laying off its five remaining employees and shutting its doors for good. [Variety]
· On a slow news day, something that might happen becomes a headline: Showtime is "close" to ordering Edie Falco's dark comedy about the life of a New York City nurse. [THR]
· Art directors hop aboard the "upstart screenwriter clout" bandwagon! Fight Club and Minority Report art director Chris Gorak will write and direct SIS—nothing to do with sisters, it's short for special investigations section—for Warner Bros. [THR]
· Despite passing on a beckoning A-Rod exclusive, Katie Couric will keep her job as the anchor of the CBS Evening News. [Variety]

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Help Keep Danny Masterson, The Pride of The Celebrity Scientologist DJ Circuit, Off The Unemployment Line

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 5:45 AM on July 19, 2008

"Prepare to be destroyed this summer," promises the website for the Hard Fest, which isn't exactly a heartwarming PLUR-like welcome. This promise (or is it a threat?) becomes even more baffling when you consider that DJ MomJeans, aka celebrity scientologist cum DJ Danny Masterson, is one of the people who makes up this bill. Currently placing somewhere outside of the Top Ten celebrity DJs — the Ronson siblings seem to have the lockdown on the top two spots — Masterson's acting career has been somewhat frigid since That '70s Show went off the air. We remember seeing Masterson in an extended cameo in the Anna Faris stoner comedy Smiley Face, and his IMDB profile shows that he's got a few projects in the pipeline, but we're glad to hear that the DJ circuit is lucrative enough for him to continue filling the coffers at the Celebrity Centre. (Those OT-VII ratings don't buy themselves, you know). Still, if you're on the hunt for a rave disguised as a sausage fest with 17 year-olds, the HARD Festival just might be the place for you this weekend. The rest of the line-up is run down after the jump.

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David Letterman Entranced By Maggie Gyllenhaal's Tale Of A Percocet-Pushing Nurse Feelgood

Posted by Molly Friedman at 5:24 AM on July 19, 2008

Even though we're a day late on this, Dark Knight' s "ironic" lingerie model Maggie Gyllenhaal appeared on Letterman Wednesday night and charmed the pants right off Dave with talk of everyone's favourite celebrity topic: drugs. Speaking in her standard sweetly candid tone, Maggie told a tale of a nurse whose number we'd really like to get a hold of — seems this kooky practitioner who aided Maggie with a broken toe is more than eager to push bundles of those morphine-patches-disguised-as-"painkillers"—Percocets—on her patients.

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The Anti-Joys Of Screen Sex With Julia Roberts

Posted by Seth at 4:30 AM on July 19, 2008

British actor Dominic West has made his biggest impression playing roguish Detective James McNulty on The Wire, but he's also find some success on the big screen: he played Renée Zellweger's lover in Chicago, and was soon after cast opposite Julia Roberts in Mona Lisa Smile. In an interview in today's The Guardian, he recalls the illuminating, grueling, and sometimes extremely annoying experience of working with Hollywood's highest-paid actresses:

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Cat Attack Sidelines 'Greatest American Dog' Contestant, Reality-Show Tears Ensue

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 4:05 AM on July 19, 2008

Last night CBS unleashed its second episode of Greatest American Dog on the American public, which promptly reached for its pepper spray before realizing the cutthroat canine competition is perhaps just the kind of gentle, slobbering reality friend we need in the summer of Denise Richards. To a point, anyhow; we wouldn't necessarily trust any of these freaks with our dogs, and we still can't be sure if Thursday's sedated-pooch pathos was touching, eerie or simply the most garishly dramatic reality-show tear-shedding of the year. Watch for yourself, tell us your choice and, in any case, wish poor Star a speedy recovery. Eleven percent of America is pulling for you, puppy! [CBS]

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'Mamma Mia' Narrowly Outpaces 'Dark Knight' in Close Race For Gayest New Release

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 3:20 AM on July 19, 2008

Until today, we didn't really know Mamma Mia! had any competition for the weekend's gay-readiest cinematic treat, with the most recent evidence stretching the film's ABBA creds to recommend tips for building your own home disco. Classy, no? But a few Dark Knight contrarians are out there, subverting the conventional wisdom ("Is Mamma Mia! the gay Batman?") and giving the musical's loyalists a run for their gay money:

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Live From Just For Laughs: The Defamer Kathy Griffin Interview

Posted by Seth at 2:24 AM on July 19, 2008

Lured as much by its illustrious roster of Hollywood comedy power-players as we were by Quebec's notoriously lax champagne-room laws and the promise of a poutine stand on every corner, Defamer dispatched editor Seth Abramovitch to Montreal to take in a few days of the 2008 Just For Laughs Festival. Now a quarter-century old, Just For Laughs has grown into the largest comedy festival—two weeks of stand-up, sketch comedy, movie screenings, and street performances. Tonight we'll be front and centre for the much-hyped Apatow For Destruction, billed as "a unique night of stand-up comedy as writer/director/producer Judd Apatow assembles a veritable all-star team with one of Canada's biggest exports, Seth Rogen, Craig Robinson, Russell Brand and a line-up of some of the most buzzed about film and TV stars in comedy."

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