Lindsay Lohan's 'Secret Half-Sister' Surfaces, Michael Lohan Excitedly Fuels Rumor's Truthiness
Posted by Molly Friedman at 9:50 AM on June 28, 2008
Not that claims like these are shocking when you're part of that wild fame-chasing bunch currently Living Lohan, but Star is reporting that one of Michael Lohan's old flings has taken a paternity test to prove her 13-year old daughter is the newest member of everyone's favourite dysfunctional family. According to the mag, a Montana woman named Kristi Kaufmann is coming forward to "make sure the truth comes out...'My daughter has a right to know who her father is -- and it's Michael.'" Now married to a new cowboy hat-wearing realtor, the 44-year old's claims aren't exactly being denied by the wig-loving Born Again. Michael's ambiguous response, and whether or not the details and timing supplied by Kaufmann support the possibility that Lindsay Lohan has yet another little sister who will inevitably want to "be just like her," after the jump.
As Michael told Extra this morning,
"I met Christie [sic] in 1982 in Houston. In 1995, when I was separated from Dina, she contacted me that she was moving to Long Island...I was with her for a week...Years later, while I was in prison, she contacted to me to say she had a paternity test done that revealed the child's father was not her husband. She said I was the only other man she had been with. My lawyers are dealing with this. When we find out the truth we will deal with it in the appropriate manner.
Michael told Star a similar tale, also ending with a remark about his notoriously excellent lawyers and their plans to "sort this out."
But OK!, who claims their story on the possible Lohan family addition is "exclusive," teases us with this juicy assurance:
"OK! has seen letters Michael wrote to the girl's mother where he says that his secret daughter 'is beginning to look a lot like Linds, with a mix of [younger brother] Cody, believe it or not.' He also sent his daughter a photograph of himself while he was still in Collins Correctional Facility which he signed 'Love Daddy.'"
While the timing and supplied details appear to line up, our excitement over whether or not the allegations are valid or not is lower on the anticipation scale than seeing actual copies of these prison love letters from Papa Michael. Mainly because we suspect they outshine those thought balloon-adorned cartoon homages Uma Thurman's stalker memorably crafted, based on Michael's history of artistic talent and prowess when it comes to freakish drawings lovingly drawn from the clink.
[Photo credits: NY Daily News, Aisha Music]

Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
There are currently no AU comments for this post.
Losin_it
Posted 10:03 AM 28/6/08
Michael Lohan is the root of all evil.
Losin_it
avocats
Posted 10:38 AM 28/6/08
"My daughter has a right to know who her father is" --uh, well, her daughter has a right to a mother who doesn't expose the child's unfortunate lineage for the whole world to know (and likely for pecuniary gain).
avocats
Passwordforgetter
Posted 11:06 AM 28/6/08
Pecuniary ? Whatever You say, Frasier.
Passwordforgetter
Passwordforgetter
Posted 11:03 AM 28/6/08
"Pecuniary"? Whatever You say, Frasier.
Passwordforgetter
Whiteboyfunfark
Posted 10:58 AM 28/6/08
"Just like her?"
It's like, yeah, motherf**cker, that kid is doomed to swerve drunkenly in and out of trendy rehab centers wearing hand-me-down cokepants and stolen fur coats until she unleashes her latent inner lesbian too late for anyone to care.
You might wanna rethink this, Mom.
Whiteboyfunfark
CluelessElaineLui
Posted 11:08 PM 28/6/08
So, this woman read, saw and looked at the trainwreck that is the Lohan family and decided that her daughter needs to be a part of them?
What is in the water that people drink these days?
CluelessElaineLui
angelheadedhipster
Posted 3:11 AM 30/6/08
I smell a new reality show . . . or better yet - a period piece! "The Other Lohan Girl" anyone?
angelheadedhipster
Losin_it
Posted 4:16 AM 30/6/08
@angelheadedhipster: Superb idea. It could take place in 18th century Russia...as Empress and leader of the clan, Dina would get to hump the first horse.
Losin_it
TheQuestion
Posted 12:51 AM 1/7/08
@Losin_it: Not really a big stretch after procreating with that horse's ass that fathered her deranged brood.
TheQuestion
CourageousCoward
Posted 2:19 AM 1/7/08
CourageousCoward
junkie
Posted 9:49 AM 1/7/08
Desperately Seeking LiLo should be greenlit any second...
junkie