David Letterman Heroically Bitch-Slaps Spencer Pratt For All Of Us
Posted by Molly Friedman at 8:15 AM on June 17, 2008
Watching Dave Letterman sucker-punch Hills axis of vapidity Spencer Pratt on The Late Show Friday night brought up one major question for us: why has it taken this long for a talking head to publicly shame the guylighted villain? Shilling, we presume, merely for the gruesome brand that is Spencer and Heidi, the numb and pathological Pratt answered a few very pointed questions regarding the MTV show's obvious scripted nature and what exactly Bromance nobody Brody Jenner does for a living. At that point, Letterman finally pulled out the big guns after Spencer boastfully claimed he "won't go to a club for less than $100,000." Dave's shock, insulting-yet-gentle series of guffaws and his no-beat-missed announcement that he wants Spencer off his set immediately sum up an interview too good to be true. See for yourself after the jump:
Dave scores his first points by feigning interest in an updated report on whatever current catfights have been set up by MTV producers between the interchangeable Hills blondes, then swiftly admitting he "has no idea" what he's talking about. But the slam dunks occur after successfully recruiting the audience to his side of the increasingly tense verbal battle, and launching into an initially innocent inquiry about rumours Pratt charges fees just to show up at nightclubs.
Pratt's decision to surpass Linda Evangelista in braggart pretension by saying (twice! and with the support of camera-ready partner in crime Heidi Montag in the green room!) he won't get out of bed for less than $100k with a straight face spurs genuine belly laughs and the classic Letterman customized-to-each-guest rebuttal: "Stop it, just stop. For a second there, I thought you actually said $100,000." But he doesn't stop there, asking Heidi if this "nonsense" is true, and pondering out loud about what kind of tricks Pratt performs to garner this fee ("bring a pony and have kids take their picture with it?"). By the time he passive-aggressively tells Spencer to get his scrawny arse and enormous head to get the fuck off his couch, Dave officially reclaims his late-night crown and reaffirms our confidence in the recently dusty goofball's improvised wizardry.
Tags: brody jenner | cbs | clips | dave letterman | heidi montag | heroes | late show with david letterman | mtv | spencer pratt | the hills


Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
j-lyn
Posted August 1, 2008 8:51 AM
Here's my prayer"lord PLEASE make them both sterile, NO MORE PRATTS!!!!!"
Dr. Spaceman, Esq.
Posted 9:00 AM 17/6/08
Destroy it with fire before it can breed.
Dr. Spaceman, Esq.
Desk_hack
Posted 9:28 AM 17/6/08
Hulk smash Speidi
Desk_hack
bess marvin, girl detective
Posted 9:19 AM 17/6/08
@jasonelias: someone explained is as CBS being owned by Viacom who also owns MTV. it's a chain of fools that ends with dave having to dance for five minutes or risk the wrath of leslie moonves
bess marvin, girl detective
ElizaGray
Posted 9:14 AM 17/6/08
If people stop paying him maybe that will mean that LA club-goers will be free of having to see him altogether? Huzzah! I think we've got it!
ElizaGray
dango
Posted 9:11 AM 17/6/08
This guy cannot be for real. Cannot be.
dango
jasonelias
Posted 9:09 AM 17/6/08
A bitch slap is the only appropriate thing to do to someone like Spencer Pratt. The bigger question is how did he get The Late Show?
jasonelias
Leviticus_71
Posted 9:05 AM 17/6/08
@Dr. Spaceman, Esq.: I second the motion. I'd pay Ron Jeremy 100k to give this douche a hiroshima sized mushroom bruise on the side of his face.
Leviticus_71
ophthalmologist
Posted 9:59 AM 17/6/08
the only reality is that these types actually exist in Hollywood, and unfortunately the rest of us have to deal with them
the blond in the green room was doubly obnoxious
ophthalmologist
Wendy_Kroy
Posted 9:54 AM 17/6/08
Remember how, once upon a time, Linda Evangelista was pilloried when she said she wouldn't get out of bed for less than $10,000 a day? How quaint in comparison... At least she was pretty; and she knew how to walk in Vivienne Westwood platform heels, which is more complicated than, say, rhythm gymnastics... or chugging Red Bull & vodka at a Brent Bolthouse boite.
Wendy_Kroy
Countess of Querulousness
Posted 9:52 AM 17/6/08
I would like a list of every club that has ever given Heidi or Spencer as much as a free glass of water to come to their establishment so I avoid those places at all cost.
Countess of Querulousness
heidiho
Posted 9:50 AM 17/6/08
Oh I hate hate hate sharing a name with that underfed trollop and her manboy.
heidiho
Calraigh
Posted 9:49 AM 17/6/08
I'm sorry, did it pass everyone by that Heidi actually said to Letterman, '' You better step your game up Mr. David Letterman.'' Can somebody please exterminate this person, please?
Calraigh
OldTowneTavern
Posted 10:38 AM 17/6/08
I've refused to watch anything regarding The Hills. I can't change my policy now, even if it involves Letterman wiping his boots all over it.
OldTowneTavern
TurdBlossom
Posted 11:47 AM 17/6/08
I just did. Now I have to go take a shower and srub my eyeballs clean.
TurdBlossom
Tiger_Tanaka
Posted 1:59 PM 17/6/08
The extraordinary thing is the he is the biggest douchebag on the show; he has serious competition from the other guys. (shudder)
Tiger_Tanaka
Xylo
Posted 1:54 PM 17/6/08
@OldTowneTavern: No, it's great - watching Dave wipe his boots all over Pratt's faux-nonchalant facial expressions.
Xylo
inkydinkydo
Posted 2:29 PM 17/6/08
I was forced to watch one episode. I think it was the season finale? Please, can someone tell me it was the series finale?
But, I suppose if the giant-headed blond troll-child and his Green Room trollop assume they can so blithely mess up Big Dave, it is still on the air.
Finally, a cause! Let us rise up and smite them and the clubs they are paid to attend (in their MINDS!)
inkydinkydo
mothrafairy
Posted 5:55 PM 17/6/08
Club them both about the head with monstrous rubber dildos. See how they like that kind of "clubbing."
mothrafairy
pepsibennett
Posted 6:25 PM 17/6/08
Double zero self awareness...wow, just wow.
pepsibennett
Trai_Dep
Posted 1:27 AM 18/6/08
If they took a collection at the door of people that DON'T want to see these celebutards in their club, the promoters would make a LOT more money than $100,000.
I'm just sayin'...
Trai_Dep
DrJimmy
Posted 1:02 AM 18/6/08
Excellent work by Brother Dave. My famous Louisville Slugger now has a date with the skulls of those two self-absorbed little twats.
DrJimmy
sybann
Posted 3:28 AM 18/6/08
Don't watch this show and never will but that guy is so gay even I can see it. Nothtatthere'sanythingwrongwiththat.
sybann
lrubemp
Posted 3:06 AM 18/6/08
I have no idea who this guy is, wouldn't give him the time of day if I saw him.
lrubemp
Shumina
Posted 2:43 AM 18/6/08
Yep. Pretty much exactly what I thought they'd be like when forced to see their ass-faces in any media. Now that I've got it confirmed, I no longer need to bother with them any longer. Ahhhhh, MTV...I remember the '80s.
Shumina
majikthise
Posted 7:43 AM 18/6/08
prat
-noun Slang. the buttocks
just sayin'
majikthise
mjlambie
Posted 4:47 AM 20/6/08
I'd never heard of this kid, and searched for him after watching the interview. In his wikipedia article, it mentions he attended Douche University.
Not sure if they'll edit it back, so i took a picture.
Flickr: [is.gd]
Wikipedia: [en.wikipedia.org]
mjlambie