Clem just emailed me and pointed out something rather important.

JAMES BLUNT IS IN MELBOURNE! HOW CAN WE TELL HIM TO KEEP UP THE CATS - STAGE DOOR?

Oh my god - our hero is in town? Keeping up the cats like no one's business? How did this good news pass us by for so long - were we somehow rendered unconscious, perhaps after unwittingly stumbling past a radio playing "Goodbye My Lover"?

If any of you are going, please hold up a giant sign that says 'KEEP UP THE CATS' for Defamer Australia. Or better yet, do you have a spare ticket?

CAN SOMEONE PUT US ON THE DOOR?

It wasn't just a weekend full of Logies news, you know. Somewhere in Queensland there are a group of people no one has any affection for battling it out for the right to possibly fill in for Millsy on a late night SMS quiz show if the Hilton-shagging host ever gets the flu.

And one of those little troopers - so to speak - is now in hospital after a disastrous Friday Night games!

Big Brother's one-metre tall housemate Rima has been forced to leave the show after breaking her leg last night. The Victorian belly dancer injured herself during the Friday Night Live show, which involves housemates competing in a series of physical challenges in order to win a prize.

A Network Ten spokesman said the pint-sized contestant was hanging from a beam on a tilting platform when she fell awkwardly. She was treated by medical staff before being transported to hospital, where x-rays confirmed she had broken her leg. "She is in fantastic spirits with her husband Carl by her side," the spokesman said.

And Kyle Sandilands no doubt hovering at the door, lecherously whispering "Just pash her, Carl... go on. Touch her. Just one kiss. That's it... that's it, Carl... linger... soak it in... You're a bad boy and she's a naughty girl..."

It will take several weeks for Rima to recover from her injury - a process that will not take place inside the house. However the spokesman left open the possibility of Rima returning at a later date. In a statement released by Network Ten, Rima said she would conduct media interviews at a later date.

What else can she add? Yep. I'm still hurt. Uh-huh. No, I don't think Australia got to know the real me in the seventeen minutes I appeared on their screens. Did I "shoot" myself? Yeah, damn straight I did. Glitter gets me hot.

"I just want you to know that the hospital food is much better than the food in the Big Brother house," she said.

And hopefully not delivered by conveyer belt, although you never know with the public health system these days etc.

After last night's Logies, Bindi Irwin can add another piece of hardware to the trophy cabinet, and no doubt she's making some room in there in anticipation of receiving one of those awkwardly shaped ARIAs in a couple of months time.

Two things I would like to note.

Firstly -

An excitable and articulate Bindi said she was shocked to win.

"This is so exciting. I can't believe it," she said on accepting the gong at Melbourne's Crown Entertainment Complex. I'd definitely like to dedicate this to my mum and dad, and I would also like to thank everybody out there who helped to watch Bindi: the Jungle Girl. It's so nice and I'd also like to thank John Stainton, who has helped me all the way through. Thank you very much. Eeeeeeee!"

Yep. Even seeing it in the written form, that blood-curdling scream of glee (perhaps a shout out in her native tongue, Animalese, to her four legged supporters watching from their enclosures at Australia Zoo?) still makes me shudder a little bit in fright.

Secondly -

Bindi has already decided where her Logie is going.

"Straight to the pool room," she said.

Oh, Bindi. Regurgitating one liners from beloved Australian films will not be enough to endear you to the Australian public. You scare them. But what can you do? You know no other life than to perform for the camera. Just like Britney. Can we really judge you for doing that which you were born and raised to do?

Yes. It freaks us out.