The impossible dream imagined last year as …

The impossible dream imagined last year as word of the scintillating, straight-to-DVD Zombie Strippers — an actual movie starring Jenna Jameson and Nightmare on Elm Street veteran Robert Englund — circulated around the Web inched closer to reality last week, with Sony Pictures so certain of the magic at hand that it announced theatrical releases in more than a dozen cities April 18. A note slipped over the Defamer transom this morning (with the accompanying poster) alluded to “worldwide media sensation” Jameson’s role in a strip club that gets hit with a secret government virus: “As one of the strippers gets the virus, she turns into a supernatural, flesh-eating zombie stripper, making her the hit of the club. Do the rest of the girls fight the temptation to be like the star stripper, even if there is no turning back?” We can hardly wait to find out, though we’re guessing that like all canonical zombie films with ripe moral metaphors on hand, only a forceful 20-spot to the G-string can save the afflicted dancers from an eternity of brain-chomping damnation. [Sony Pictures]