A Pleasant Mental Image For Your Afternoon: Kerry Packer And Heather Mills, Sitting In A Tree...!

Posted by Clem Bastow at 1:31 PM on April 23, 2008

Just when you thought you'd heard the last of Heather Mills, she's baaaack, and bringing with her possibly the most gruesome alleged twosome we've ever had the displeasure of imagining: new reports suggests that the late Kerry Packer was Mills' "sugar daddy"!

A new documentary outs Kerry Packer as a "sugar daddy" of Heather Mills when the ex-wife of Beatle Paul McCartney was working as a high-class call girl, according to London's Daily Mail.

Denise Hewitt, who says she worked as a £10,000 escort with Ms Mills in the Eighties, makes the claims in a program to be aired on the UK's Channel 4.

Ms Hewitt, 44, is quoted as saying: "We went into high-class prostitution behind closed doors and nobody knew about it...[billionaire arms dealer Adnan] Kashoggi, Kerry Packer and one of the Royal princes of Saudi, they were the big fish and there were a couple of others that were classed as Heather's sugar daddies.

Lordy, we don't know what to think - after all, the British press has been at pains to paint Mills as a psychotic, money-grubbing sex maniac for some time now, so it could well be malarkey. But as far as the mental image of Kerry and Heather rutting it out on a bed of money, let us be the first to say:

And that will be the last we say on the matter!

Comments

SJB

Posted April 23, 2008 11:30 PM

Here I was, hoiking down the last of my freshly stewed prune juice, thinking that things couldn't get much worse...or at least, not as bad as the scene in 'Death at a Funeral' when Uncle Alfie's bowel movements didn't all go down according to plan. Hell on earth, what a coupling! Heather and her prosthetic...Kerry and his defibrillator...Prune juice and geriatric faeces suddenly take on a new and strangely, less offensive slant.