Bang Bang, You're F--ked - No, Seriously: Chopper Didn't Like Your Show
Posted by Clem Bastow at 12:02 PM on April 1, 2008
If there's one person in the world that you probably don't want to get on the bad side of, it's Mark "Chopper" Read, ex-con, hitman, rapper and artist (in roughly that order).
Not that we're suggesting Chopper's planning to take a shotgun over to Channel Nine because he didn't think much of Underbelly, but still - wouldn't you rather he really, really liked the drama? Actually, maybe not.
We're scared, hold us.
"I'm enjoying it, but there should definitely be more shooting and less rooting," he told the mag.


We've spent a long time now with the freewheeling, Emmy-winning Jeremy Piven of Today: Oozing confidence from every pore of his shredded, hairless body (save for his scalp), that Piven is an Arian super-man. It's enough to make you forget about the Jeremy Piven of Yesterday, as featured in
Katherine Heigl continues to ever so subtly remind her husband Josh "Call Me Joshua" Kelley that she does, and always will, wear the pants in their frightening relationship. This time, domestic issues are going beyond
Predictable as it was by 
Singer/actress/
Judging by some of the odder items featured on Juno Lynn Spears' alleged
Former Celebrity Mum of The Year Kerry Katona™ continues to kick parenting goals that we're guessing her PR peeps would probably prefer we didn't hear about, except - oops! - Kerry invited MTV cameras into her life and home for her fly-on-the-wall series, Crazy In Love.
There are a few people in this world that you know will always provide hilarious/troubling soundbites, and Keith Richards is one of them (the others are George W. Bush and Kristy from Big Brother).
Having flirted with dangerous levels of underexposure since winning her Best Screenplay Oscar a little over a month ago, Diablo Cody is back with a double-barreled blast of creative miracles. First up, The Hollywood Reporter
We've never tuned in to
Because our Sunday wouldn't have been the same without at least four hours committed to work, Defamer crashed yesterday's U.S. press conference for the new Martin Scorsese/Rolling Stones concert film Shine a Light. It's not half-bad for Stones or Scorsese fans, with a rangy set list and intoxicating camerawork that both might run a little long for the average viewer. Not easily starstruck, we nevertheless felt a mild succession of twinges upon the band and their director's entrance ("Holy shit, Keith Richards really does look like that," etc.), none more acute than when a Paramount publicist, clearly by accident, let us sneak a question in.
A frustrated, out-of-work actor has taken to Craigslist in search of "alternative methods" to prepare for an upcoming audition: "One of my friends suggested I get into white magic, but I think I should find a expert or someone who knows what they are doing...if you could write me with whatever idea/spell you have to help me that would be great, because like I said I have never done this before." It's actually not the craziest idea we've ever heard, but we'd caution that this sort of thing isn't for the casual dark arts dabbler; properly casting a casting spell is a science, if anything, requiring just the right measurements of eye of lapdog, hair of Andy Dick, and breath of 1st AD. [
Arguably the last Hollywood reach-around that still truly matters, it's hardly a surprise to see some of the world's biggest stars line up for their turn to get slimed at the Nickelodeon's Kids Choice Awards—a relatively minor price to pay to ingratiate yourself to a new generation of prepubescent fans, who'll come away viewing you not just as some relic steeped in old-man smell, but as certified lunchbox-adornment material.
Our condolences go out this morning to Paramount, whose
The