Weekend At Britney’s: Pool-Drenched iPhones And ‘Milky Bowls Of Soup’

What better way to start the week than with another batshit episode contributing to the American Tragedy that is Britney Spears? According to the always-credible Fleet Street tabloid The Sun, Britney went into (sigh) one of her now-signature rampages after allegedly discovering roughly a dozen “flirty” text messages in current beau Adnan Ghalib’s iPhone, a rampage that concluded with Britney tossing the pricy toy into her pool. Apparently, the famewhoriest paparazzo in the world has been photographed canoodling with a waitress, and The Package discovered their illicit texts (described as “pretty saucy stuff with sexual references — certainly not the sort you’d send to just a friend”). And yet, the best is yet to come: in response to his dearest’s accusations, Adnan hand-wrote a child-like love letter to the maybe-bipolar “singer,” complete with the nauseating phrase “milky bowl of soup.” An image of the pathetic apology, complete with scrawled hearts and florist letterhead, after the jump. Adnan’s presumably tear-drenched note is pictured here, courtesy of The Sun:

As far as we can tell, the note reads: “Britney Bebe I really miss you, lots and lots and lots,. Cant Wait til you come home to a milky bowl of soup. Love You always. [Testicular-shaped heart] Adnan.” Which is really the sweetest “I’m sorry I cheated” letter we’ve read since that time our 7th grade kissing buddy told us he liked feeling us up lots and lots and lots and would have a bowl full of Alphabet Soup waiting for us in the cafeteria during recess. (Seriously, what is this guy, 35 going on 3? Stop! The! Insanity!)

[Photo Credit: The Sun]

• ANGRY BRITNEY SPEARS THROWS ADNAN GHALIB’S IPHONE INTO POOL [The Sun]