What better way to start the week than with another batshit episode contributing to the American Tragedy that is Britney Spears? According to the always-credible Fleet Street tabloid The Sun, Britney went into (sigh) one of her now-signature rampages after allegedly discovering roughly a dozen "flirty" text messages in current beau Adnan Ghalib's iPhone, a rampage that concluded with Britney tossing the pricy toy into her pool. Apparently, the famewhoriest paparazzo in the world has been photographed canoodling with a waitress, and The Package discovered their illicit texts (described as "pretty saucy stuff with sexual references -- certainly not the sort you'd send to just a friend"). And yet, the best is yet to come: in response to his dearest's accusations, Adnan hand-wrote a child-like love letter to the maybe-bipolar "singer," complete with the nauseating phrase "milky bowl of soup." An image of the pathetic apology, complete with scrawled hearts and florist letterhead, after the jump.

Adnan's presumably tear-drenched note is pictured here, courtesy of The Sun:

As far as we can tell, the note reads: "Britney Bebe I really miss you, lots and lots and lots,. Cant Wait til you come home to a milky bowl of soup. Love You always. [Testicular-shaped heart] Adnan." Which is really the sweetest "I'm sorry I cheated" letter we've read since that time our 7th grade kissing buddy told us he liked feeling us up lots and lots and lots and would have a bowl full of Alphabet Soup waiting for us in the cafeteria during recess. (Seriously, what is this guy, 35 going on 3? Stop! The! Insanity!)

[Photo Credit: The Sun]

• ANGRY BRITNEY SPEARS THROWS ADNAN GHALIB'S IPHONE INTO POOL [The Sun]

Tags: adnan ghalib | as my iphone gently weeps | britney spears