It seems clear that when an actress’ career is going nowhere fast, there is only one place to turn: commercials for over-the-hill underwear! Following Jennifer Love Hewitt’s sizable lead, Sarah Chalke will be the new face (and butt) of the Hanes No Ride Up Panty line, a collection which appears to be inspired by everyone’s grandmother’s undergarments. They’re big, they’re thick, and they’re targeted for every gal out there who suffers from too frequent wedgies. Though Sarah does look lovely (and “wedgie-free”!) in the Hanes print ad, we’re a little nervous to view the commercial spot scheduled during March 11’s American Idol. As much as we adore Sarah and the Hanes marketing team’s dedication to pulling an idea out of their asses (pun most definitely intended), we feel obligated to remind them of the world’s long-ago-discovered antidote to the panty slip-n-slide: thongs. [ONTD]