Ashton Kutcher To Fix It So You Never Believe Anything You Read About That Paris Hilton Whore Again

Finally! Someone has the guts to stand up for the world’s downtrodden hotel heiresses, whose only desire is that they be left to live their lives in peace, free from the flashbulb-popping scavengers of the celebrity media. That’s what has emerged from the recent photos published just about everywhere–including here–of Paris Hilton, accompanied by what turns out was not her guru, but an actor hired to fool us into thinking as much by Ashton Kutcher’s new prank series, Pop Fiction:

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