Paris Hilton Under Investigation For Severe Case Of Puppy Love
Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 3:34 AM on February 16, 2008
Perhaps as some sort of karmic payback for forcing thousands of Americans to endure Ellen Degeneres' terrible dance moves each and every weekday, it seems that The Ellen Degeneres Show is attempting to make things right by playing a part in getting Paris Hilton busted for overzealously breeding dogs. After Paris admitted to Ellen last week that she owns 17 dogs and likes to sleep with "all of them," the Los Angeles Department of Animal Services paid a visit to the Hilton home to investigate. While it's too early to learn this offense will land Paris back in the slammer (or, for that matter, the pound), we can't help but be reminded how similar this storyline is to a Season Two episode of The Sarah Silverman Program.
Specifically, we're thinking of the episode in which Sarah had to go to dog-butt-licking rehab after getting a bit too intimate with her chihuahua-esque friend Doug. After taking the stand and convincing everyone that bestiality is chill, all charges against the fictional Sarah Silverman were dropped. So! Even if Paris didn't get a little touchy-feely with all her chompers, she should take a cue from Sarah and defend her dog addiction: "My name is Paris Hilton, and I am a dog-aholic."

Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
There are currently no AU comments for this post.
NotReadyForPrimeTime
Posted 4:28 PM 16/2/08
How does she even know she has 17? Hasn't she mis-placed most of them?
NotReadyForPrimeTime
fembot
Posted 4:28 PM 16/2/08
boop97006:
- your comments make the whole story. LOL
why doesn't that surprise me
fembot
Boop97006
Posted 4:28 PM 16/2/08
Okay, hate to admit it, but I was in the audience that day. There was more dialoge that was cut....Ellen was pretty shocked (we all were) and asked her if she knew that she was supposed to spay and neuter....she whined, "I know that NOW". She also said that she rotates them out three at a time, so 'nobody feels left out'.
Boop97006
SteamyMcFirecrotch
Posted 4:28 PM 16/2/08
Larry King: So you're saying you don't have 17 dogs?
Paris Hilton: No.
LK: Didn't you tell Ellen DeGeneres you had 17 dogs?
PH: No.
LK: So you don't have 17 dogs and you never told Ellen Degeneres you had 17 dogs?
PH: No.
LK: What's you favorite dog's name?
PH: They're all my favorites.
SteamyMcFirecrotch
Dwayne Provecho
Posted 6:24 AM 18/2/08
@Boop97006: I'm inferring from this that it was Ellen that made the call to DAS. If Animal Planet knew what was good for them, they'd make this whole saga into a ripped-from-the-headlines TV-movie, STAT.
Dwayne Provecho
Miss d
Posted 4:35 PM 18/2/08
There's .6repeated dog that is going wanting...
Miss d