Tidying Up For Oscar
Posted by Seth at 12:01 PM on February 23, 2008
· Yo! Oscar! Over here! It's the 80th Annual Academy Awards Sunday evening, and good things invariably come in extremely round numbers. As is our custom, we'll be liveblogging the entire, bloated affair. Live! (Did we mention that already?) It promises to be four-plus hours of wildly inebriated fun. Be there: 5 p.m. Pacific. And if you can't spend it with us, then we hope you enjoy catching Hepatitis A at Madonna's. That should be a good time, too.
· Pop quiz: What do Lindsay Lohan, Marilyn Monroe, two boobs, and innumerable freckles have in common? Hint: Dina Lohan couldn't be prouder.
· What's with Where the Wild Things Are? Leaked screen tests. Poor audience responses. Possible plug pullings!
· For fans of Can't Stop the Music, and just about no one else: Steve Guttenberg to boogie back into your hearts on Dancing with the Stars.
· My dinner with Clooné.
· Scarlett and Natalie are willing to go there for Boleyn. But can the same be said for Christina and Reese?
· OMG! Hepatitis scare at Ashton's 30th birthday! We know...He's only 30!
· "Paging Dr. Pinsky. Dr. Pinsky to admissions."
· J-Lo's gemini miracle fails to enthrall a nation.
· Hobble your way to digital satellite clarity!
· The lavender Idol monster is back, dragging along some controversy and Apple riding piggyback.
· Put that broken heel under your pillow, and just maybe, Shoe Fairy Neil Patrick Harris with put a brand new pair of Louboutins under your pillow.

· This week's Dirt Sandwich is comprised of tragic tales of depression/cancer/diabetes/AIDS, tiger attacks and missing family members. And, as usual, they were handled with the grace and aplomb we have come to expect from paragons of journalistic integrity like Mark McGrath and Donny Osmond.
Kevin O'Connell, the Susan Lucci of the sound-mixing set, is nominated for an Oscar yet again, this time for his work on Transformers. That makes 20 nominations, 0 wins. (7 more and Katherine Heigl plays him in the movie of his life! Rimshot.) Little Gold Men caught up with O'Connell, but judiciously failed to bring up the infamous
While it remains to be seen whether or not Diablo Cody will be joining the likes of Cameron Crowe and Woody Allen on the list of Oscar-winning writers, one thing is certain: she'll be 
Parenthood groups are always trying to ruin the fun. Just after adorable homocidal freak Dexter made his debut on CBS to
While we've attempted to handicap the Oscars acting races as best as we know how, we've failed to factor in one crucial angle: how yumcakes the male nominees look without a shirt on! Luckily,
For every swan dress there is a fire engine red body-hugger worn by the likes of Catherine Zeta-Jones, or one of those golden sparkle-y things that just melts all over Halle Berry's body. To prove we're not just big meanies when it comes to discussing Oscar outfits of yesterday, we've put together our Top Ten picks for the most exclamatory, drop-dead dresses ever worn on an Oscar red carpet, and even redeemed one member of the Worst Club by placing her at the shiny top of our Best-Dressed cake.
With the party circuit looking more anemic than ever, leave it to the least likely culprits --
Yes, sadly, it's that time again. Time to stare into the lifeless abyss that is the Swan Dress. But Bjork's legendary snafu has friends! Like Celine Dion's Backwards Suit, Gwyneth Paltrow's Saggy Boob Goth Gown and Corey Feldman's Hammer Pants. All have appeared at one Oscars showdown or another, and all are here for your enjoyment once again.
· The five Best Picture nominees have earned $97 million since they were announced, more than twice what last year's nominees made in the same time period. Expect a two-page trade ad from the Academy touting that sum in 248-pt. font over the words "BIGGEST. OSCAR. BUMP. EVER." [
When it comes to the Oscars, who you bring is just as important as
Lindsay Lohan's recent decision to strip down to nothing for an egregiously under-airbrushed
This weekend's episode of Saturday Night Live will not only be its first since the WGA Strike shut down production of the show back in November, but it also marks the debut of the show's newest cast member,
Except for (maybe) George Clooney, the nominees for Best Actor at this year's Oscars aren't known for playing it safe on the red carpet. From Daniel Day-Lewis's preference for tiny suits to Viggo Mortensen's disdain for anything bland, we're not accustomed to seeing plain penguin tuxes from this group. But judging from their track records, they all have ways of showing their true colors without actually wearing them all at once. So we reviewed their greatest hits and greatest misses to figure out which way they should swing on Sunday.
It's a scene far more horrific than anything Wes Craven could dream up in one of his films. 
Exciting news for actress/singer/fragrance magnate Jennifer Lopez and singer/actor/Caesar-supporter Marc Anthony, for the two are the proud parents of bouncing baby twins--one J and one Lo--born shortly after midnight in a New York-area hospital. Having dropped