This is a nice clip of Angie Hart performing 'Stop Buying Things' on The Morning Show yesterday.

Isn't it lovely? And look at Facebook hater/Mitch Hedberg lover Dan Luscombe gently but powerfully work that guitar! Phwoaaar - ladies form an orderly queue, etc...

We are, of course, deeply disappointed Angie lied to the good people of Channel Seven by claiming she hadn't performed Accidently Kelly Street for anyone in yeeeaaars when our Serious Journalism revealed late last year that she belted out an a capella version for a small child in Adelaide during her October tour (and whatever happened to that "only for people under the age of eight" rule, anyway? THE HOSTS OF THE MORNING SHOW ARE QUITE OBVIOUSLY OVER THE AGE OF EIGHT, WOMAN, WHY DO YOU FIB?) but all in all, this is a charming performance and we give everyone involved three thumbs up.

MORE: Angie Hart on MySpace.

Our Eric Bana continues to prove what a top bloke he is on his rounds in Hollywood, today taking the time out to let everyone know that the rumoured feud between his The Other Boleyn Girl co-stars Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson is, in fact, not true (although he could have just shut up and stepped aside while the pair pashed on the red carpet, but you know, whatever).

The homegrown hunk went out of his way to insist the screen sisters got on famously while pressing the flesh at the Berlin Film Festival.

"I hate to break it to you but actors really do love each other," Bana said.

"It's a crazy job and we put ourselves in vulnerable positions.

"I don't care if it sounds corny but it's true - you're part of a brotherhood, and protect each other."

While we're not sure just how Scarlett and Natalie would feel at being called members of a brotherhood, we're sure they appreciate the sentiment behind it.

However, there is one thing that has been troubling us about this story, and it isn't Eric's gender-blind ways or Scarlett and Natalie's kiss. It's the photo of the pair of them on the red carpet, in which Natalie reminded us rather alarmingly of someone we haven't seen for a while. Our Photoshop whizzes have whipped up a little 'Separated At Birth' for your delectation:

We don't want to scare you, Natalie, but you might want to go and get checked out for nodules, you know, as a precautionary measure.

We've just got a strong feeling about this, and our grandmother once predicted that the old woman across the road would come down with terrible haemmorhoids, so this sort of premonition stuff is in our blood.

Remember last year in April, how topless photos of Lara Bingle "surfaced" on the German GQ website, and the resulting hordes of click-happy blokes crashed the site, and Lara was all "you betrayed me!" and the photographer was all "nuh uh!"?

Well, you best take your deja vu medication, because like the Time Warp, it's all happening again!

Yes, and while we're not sure the same photo can "surface" twice, that didn't stop News Ltd from breathlessly reporting the story and providing rudey nudey links to the shots without so much as an "NSFW!"

SHE looked like the girl next door when she was in Adelaide for the Gerard McCabe Jewellers Celebrity Tennis Challenge late last year. But Lara Bingle's topless past has come back to haunt her - again.

The Aussie model and partner of Aussie cricket captain-in-waiting Michael Clarke, who first got our attention as the star of the "Where the bloody hell are you" campaign, is on display on German website GQ.

It's the same website which last March caused Bingle grief and sent Australian males spending a lot of time with their PCs.

Yes, it's the same website - and the same photo, dudes! They even linked to it way back in April here.

Either we spend too much time looking at classy nude pictures of cheery tourism models, or someone at the News Ltd scandal desk needs to have their eyesight checked.

Or perhaps they're just confused because this time Lara doesn't seem to be shooting black starbursts out of her nipples?

We've complained in the past about how much we envy the Brits their trashtastic celebreality programming, but we think they may have come up with the ultimate blow to any other country's aspirations in the same genre, by allowing Former Celebrity Mum of The Year Kerry "My Drug Hell"/"My Pregnancy Scare"/"My Back Room Needs Renovating So Make The Cheque Out To Cash Thanks" Katona in front of a camera with her new series, Crazy In Love, which is designed to show the public how loving her marriage with Mark Croft is - but like so many who have gone before her (Jessica, Britney, Anna Nicole, Flavor Flav), it hasn't turned out exactly as sympathetically as she might have hoped.

The picture we've chosen to illustrate this piece is from the show, a scene where Kerry strips down - pregnant - to do a "sexy" photo shoot. And there are many more unbelievable screen caps here, just begging to be LOLKERRY'd.

The couple allowed TV crews into their lives to film MTV documentary Kerry Katona: Crazy in Love to prove that despite rumours of a troubled relationship, their marriage is stronger than ever.

But their plan may have backfired, with the pair spending much of last night's debut program telling one another to "shut your face" and "shut your trap."

Making a splash: the pair regularly told one another to 'shut your face' during last night's show
Leaving charm at the door, Mark was also filmed saying: "She's like a bad fart, she lingers but she does go away.

"I'm romantic, I often just say to her spontaneously lets go out and get a meal. Kerry's never took me out for a meal, she doesn't appreciate the things I do for her.

"I show my affection and love for you and you just show me hatred."

It goes without saying, naturally, that if any UK-based Defamer Australia pals feel like whacking a tape in for this one and sending it over post haste, we will be forever thankful.

Judging by the comments on that story, we think the British public liked it, too: "Poor, poor unborn baby. With a selfish, vain, odious creature like Kerry Katona for a mother and a scruffy, common, ugly wimp for a father the poor bairn doesn't stand a chance. Why on earth would a couple like that even contemplate bringing a child into their world. They need to grow up themselves first."

Winner!

One would think that, in this notoriety-disguised-as-genuine-fame days we live in, Ben Cousins would be high at the top of any PR lackey's guest list. After all, if Corey can get an agent and public appearance royalties, surely Mr 'Such Is Life' could at least expect a few free drinks and a goodie bag?

Well, it appears we may have the freebie industry all wrong, as Cousins only made it into MTV Australia's Good Vibrations/Kanye West afterparty thanks to the gift of his gab.

Management from the music channel MTV - the key media sponsors of the festival - were stunned when the notorious party boy talked his way past security manning the entry and into the exclusive, invitation-only party in the VIP tent.

While celebs and rockers including Erika Heynatz, Alex Dimitriades, Cypress Hill and N'fa mingled in the VIP party, Cousins kept a low profile after crashing the event with a mate around 4pm.

"He was never invited to our party but obviously used his name to get in," an MTV spokeswoman said yesterday.

"It created a real buzz in the room because he's such a well-known party boy - everyone was saying 'did you see Ben Cousins?"'

Now, correct us if we're wrong, but if MTV could appreciate the "buzz" Cousins caused once he entered the party, they would've thought to invite him in the first place?

Or maybe this is ALL just some sort of elaborate, Matrix-esque effort to make us think that the world of guest lists and PR and "don't you know who I am" still exists and that fame is actually discerning, when we know that the reality is that any nonentity who shows their boobs on Big Brother can be the subject of an 'In Depth' profiling just years later.

Amy Winehouse found a novel way to react to the news that her No Good™ husband Blake Fielder-Civil had overdosed in prison - instead of, you know, visiting him in the prison hospital, or sending flowers, she did what all good wives would do in a similar situation: she went to get a bucket of KFC to drown her sorrows. Cheers!

However, what has the UK tabs aflutter is the fact that Winegums chose to mark the sorry occasion by sporting a drawn-on teardrop under her eye:

The singer who is battling her own recovery from crack and heroin addiction was seen in Camden with a black teardrop painted on her left cheek, and looked tired and subdued.

Amy appeared to have used the eyeliner she draws her trademark thick black eye make-up on with, to add the mournful facial decoration.

Naturally we are certain that dear old Winegums is doing this to signify her sorrow at Blake's misfortune, but we couldn't also help recalling that - in prison - a teardrop tatt quite often implies that you have committed a murder whilst incarcerated.

Either that or you're a kiddy fiddler.

A few years back, Welsh warbler (and now mother of one) Charlotte Church was the host of her own show in the UK, cleverly titled The Charlotte Church Show. The only thing we really knew about her telly program was that it was the place Amy Winehouse delivered - with the help of Charlotte - a disastrous (and allegedly drunken) cover of Billie Jean, but apparently it didn't do too badly, and a week or so ago Channel 4 announced that Charlotte's show, on hiatus after the birth of her first child, would be making a return mid-2008.

Why are we telling you all this?

Because we just watched the following sketch featuring a disguised Charlotte interviewing Kerry Katona (you know her, right?) and surprised ourselves by laughing, as they say, out loud. We kinda wish the show was shown in Australia.

Charlotte's comments about Delta Goodrem's future husband Brian McFadden were especially enjoyable.

And after the jump? Another interview (Church-less, alas) featuring Kerry Katona talking to celeb gossip site HolyMoly whilst scoffing hot chips. Just because.

Read More »

Give some credit to Harper's Bazaar photog Jeff Reidel for convincing Frances Bean Cobain to strike an Evita Peron pose in the newest issue of the magazine. While we're pretty sure that the meta-ness of dressing up as a character that one of her mother's biggest rivals once portrayed on the silver screen was lost on the young Miss Cobain, we here at Defamer HQ are eating it up as if it were a late-afternoon sandwich made by none other than Marshall McLuhan himself. Speaking of which, we can't wait for the day when a wildly drunk and bloated Frances Bean crashes a televised interview of Lourdes Maria Ciccone Leon. We're sure the look on the animatronic Kurt Loder's face is gonna be priceless. [Harper's Bazaar via Gawker]

Read More »

... but, dear Sydney Confidential, is it really possible to justify a special "in depth" section on your website for Krystal Forscutt? Heath Ledger we can understand, Kim Kardashian not so much... but Krystal?

Is there any depth to the massively jugged Zoo Weekly lass? We've perused your special Forscutt feature page and from what we can tell, it's essentially a diary of the adventures of her norgs, with the linked pieces filled with words and terms like "busting", "ample", "pump up", "personal assets", and "naked ambition" which gives the whole thing a delightful Carry On! feel.

Krystal's tits visit a game show!
Krystal's tits go to East Timor!
Krystal's tits go to Channel Seven to audition for It Takes Two!
Krystal's tits look for property in Bondi!

Still, any excuse for a picture gallery, eh?

WE STILL LOVE YOU, CONFIDENTIAL!

We just don't understand why you think a special Krystal Forscutt section would be appealing to people clicking their way through the maze that is The Interwebs.

Oh, right. As you were.

Jose Padilha's Tropa de Elite (Elite Squad) took home the Golden Bear prize for Best Film at the 58th Annual Berlin Film Festival this weekend. The film is described by Beyond Hollywood as "a kind of the anti-City of God that follows the Rio de Jainero police rather than the criminals" and is already a huge hit in its native Brazil, where THR reports that it "more than 11.5 million people [have seen] it on pirated DVDs." Pirated DVDs, eh? You can bet that a whole gaggle full of studio execs read that, promptly tossed their cookies and then subsequently thanked their lucky stars that BitTorrent still hasn't broken through into the mainstream here Stateside. [THR, Hollywood Elsewhere]

Read More »

Because we at Defamer would like nothing more than to place visiting couples fully indoctrinated into The Lifestyle with spouse-sharing-curious members of the showbiz community who also happen to be in possession of a spare pair of tickets to the Academy Awards and Governor's Ball, we now faithfully reproduce for you a Craigslist ad brought to our attention over the weekend. (It's since been removed by conscientious members of the Craigslist community, who strongly feel that whoring our one's wife, however much mutual consent is involved, has no place in the most venerated and dignified awards show of all. Get thee to The Flackies, pervies!) The ad begins like this:

Read More »

We just stumbled across this clip of Gossip frontwoman Beth Ditto talking about bullying (while watching another video featuring Beth and former Pulp star Jarvis Cocker collaborating on a cover of Heaven17's Temptation) and we felt we should write about it as it sends an important message out to Young People who are, of course, our primary audience here at Defamer Australia. Well, Young People - and Homosexuals. And Women. And the odd Straight Adult Male. Oh, and occasionally Reporters from Assorted Current Affairs Shows (there's a story for another day!) but mostly, MOSTLY, youthful homosexual Anna Corens. Wait, what? We're confused.

Here's Beth's advice on bullying.

In summation - Beth is more than just an especially curvy figure on the cover of NW Magazine when they choose to bang out one of their "STARS PILE ON THE POUNDS... AT LAST!" photo specials, she is also a rocker against high school bullying who believes pushing people into lockers is "totally boring".

We've all learned something here today.

Poor Mark Ronson. It just hasn't been a good couple of years for the bloke, if you choose to selectively ignore the fact he has produced several amazingly successful albums and is also a thoroughly hot tamale to boot, like we have.

Exhibit A - Mark was attacked by a dog whilst stepping in after a Pit Bull Terrier got "all up" in his dog Maude's "grill", and required a tetanus shot.

... despite the several layers of clothing Ronson was wearing, the Pit Bull still managed to bite into the music star's flesh. He says, "My dog, Maude, sometimes gets into scraps. I jumped into one fight - it was the middle of winter and I was wearing three T-shirts, a jumper, a shirt and a jacket, and this Bull Terrier bit through all six layers. I needed a tetanus shot".

EMO SADNESS SCORE - 2/5

Exhibit B - Mark has also broken up with his long term girlfriend, despite his beautiful face and fat wallet. Thank god Amy Winehouse is around to remind him things could be much worse comfort him.

He said: "It's sad times for me at the moment. I was dating my girlfriend for three years but we split up. "I'm lucky I have good friends. Amy has been brilliant and is always there for me - and I'm there for her too."

Please note: this does not mean Mark is slipping anything inappropriate inside Amy.

But Mark wants to make it clear: allegations of an affair with married Rehab singer Amy, which surfaced last month, are absolutely unfounded. Ronson, who produced her Back To Black album which won her five Grammy awards earlier this month, was accused of spending the night with the troubled 24-year-old after they were snapped leaving the K West hotel, in West London, together in the middle of the night. However, Mark insists there was "no possibility" of a showmance. He said at the time: "I am sick of talking about it. Amy is a friend." And that's why she's helping him get over his heartache

EMO SADNESS SCORE: 3/5 (Heartache is difficult, but eight billion awards should help ease the pain)

Very good.

Even before we knew what "smokin' somethin'" meant, we knew that the creators of The Smurfs were smokin' a little somethin' somethin'. After all, anyone who would create a world inhabited by little blue men who spoke in a a trippy language and lived in magic mushrooms had to be one of those "Mary Jane smokin' hippies" that our parents always warned us about. So after seeing some stills from the upcoming Smurfs movie, we're enthralled to see that the French animators who are making the film sure seem to be smokin' somethin' too. Seems as though this adaptation will finally tell the tale the way it was meant to be told: darkly.

Read More »

The other day (week, maybe?) we borrowed a friend's dictpahone and marched off to a local cafe to interrogate controversial (well, while we haven't actually checked his blog, if history is anything to go by then we'll dare to assume her recent piece about Lollipop Ladies/Gentlemen probably riled up Andrew Bolt into a frothy metaphor-spitting fury) columnist for The Age, Ms Catherine Deveny.

FACT! Deveny is actually Catherine's married name!

FACT! We are clearly shitting you. Feel free to LOL or ROFL in your own time at our great wit.

Anyway, we indulged in some Serious Journalism and then happily toddled off home. And realised we'd returned the dictpahone too early and in this technologically advanced era of iPods (OURS BROKE ON SATURDAY, SEND A NEW ONE IMMEDIATELY) and CD players, we don't actually have a tape deck to listen - and thus transcribe for your reading pleasure - our no holds barred Catherine Deveny piece.

The good news is, we've finally wrangled back our mate's dictaphone!

The bad news is, we haven't transcribed it yet as we've been a bit under the weather!

The good news is, we'll get onto it either this afternoon, or tomorrow.

The bad news is, we cried at an episode of Undercover Angels last night and now we want to bludgeon ourselves to death due to the shame of it all. Stupid sign language choirs and separated lovers and distant relatives and our hatefully sensitive Piscean nature...

CATHERINE DEVENY, IF YOU ARE READING THIS RIGHT NOW - YOU'RE STILL GOING DOWN. ALRIGHT? WE ARE GOING TO "BLOW" THE "LID" OFF YOUR COMMIE WAYS, AND THEN WE'RE GOING TO LAUGH ABOUT IT LATER WHILE WATCHING THE ENTIRE 7TH HEAVEN DVD BOXSET AT ANDREW BOLT'S HOUSE.

PS: We also went to Spicks and Specks the other night and will write about that too. In time. We must repair ourselves slowly, people!

After last night's viewing of So You Think You Can Dance, we fell head over heels with Natalie Bassingthwaighte's particular style of television presenting. Looks of intense concentration, Oscar-worthy emotion mustered up at the drop of a hat, and as for her unscripted bits of banter- well, we are heartily smitten. So we are calling all Defamer Australia readers to nominate their own favourite one liners and special moments during the series by emailing your friendly auto-reply service at this address and we'll regularly compile the Greatest Hits in a (potentially) regular segment we're calling Totally Addicted To The Bass. After all, there are rare occasions the Defamer Australia team must leave the house at night, and we simply couldn't sleep soundly knowing we'd missed hearing something like "Okay Courtney, you need to sit on the stool now" uttered with a stern, straight face by The Bass.

Also, you may like to contribute your own photoshopped Bass pictures as our own "mad graphic skillz" leave a little to be desired. Feel free not to point that fact out, ever.

According to an extensive New York profile out today, Heath Ledger spent his final days deeply engrossed in researching and writing a script based on the life and death of Nick Drake. In case you missed the whole Drake resurgence of the late `90s (spurred by Volkswagen's usage of his song "Pink Moon" in a now-classic advert), he was an English singer-songwriter who battled insomnia and depression before overdosing in his bed at age 26. Sounds sickeningly familiar, right? According to the piece, Heath's last weeks involved saying goodbye to the Nice Guy character he'd played publicly since the birth of his daughter Matilda and falling into another role altogether: a depressed, masked public figure who, consumed with writing the Drake screenplay, just might have got too close to his subject.

Read More »

Is there nothing Merrick won't do in order to prompt mild chuckling from an audience? Ho, ho - there is not! His co-host Tim "Rosso" Ross recently got hitched, and Merrick decided to use the occasion to jam his tongue down the throat of one of the older ladies attending the nuptials.

This is going straight to the wank bank.

Hang on. No it isn't.

When reader Beth (thanks, by the way!) sent us in the following clip for our daily dose of YouTube idiocy and we saw the title of the piece was Corey Delaney: The Leader Of The Liberal Party, we thought "Oh no! We're over Corey, will we find this video amusing?"

The answer is yes, kids. Wonderfully put together, and Corey Worthington Delaney MySpazz Whateverthehellnameheisgoingby still delivers a less infuriating apology than Brendan Nelson.

Bravo, Beth!

Readers should send in their nominations for YouTube Clip Of The Day here.

It's tough out there for Neil Patrick Harris. First, the evil geniuses behind Harold & Kumar force him to film scenes atop a sparkly unicorn. Now, those nefarious producers at PBS have cast him on Sesame Street as a character called The Shoe Fairy. After telling Conan's audience that he "loves puppets!" and misunderstanding their muffled laughs, Harris goes on to give us a sample of what those sneaky writers put in his script:

I had to say lines like, 'I am the greatest fairy in all the land!'"

Read More »

Christopher Walken, beloved star of True Romance, and, more recently, testicular-imagery-laden competitive table tennis spoof Balls of Fury, showed up in person Friday night to collect his Hasty Pudding Man of the Year award from the famous Harvard dramatic club. The appearance took full advantage of the multi-talented icon, with Pudding members requesting that Walken perform a song from Hairspray, intone his "more cowbell" catchphrase from the classic SNL skit, and, in a scenario that perhaps skirted the boundaries of good taste, reenact the Russian Roulette scene from The Deer Hunter using a Super Soaker filled with strawberry jam.

Read More »

Because we're just in that sort of mood this morning, we'd like to begin by looking at the positives in this article regarding Bindi Irwin's new incarnation as a talking doll.

Firstly, Dark Crystal fans, Bindi is still being officially classified as human. Says mother Terri "She is still a nine-year-old human being. She is a real girl," which is comforting - if there's one thing Terri Irwin knows about, it's the classification of animal species.

Secondly, Bindi is like a Mr Chips for nature-obsessed children. Continues Terri "She takes being a role model seriously, she equates what she does with being a teacher, like her teacher Miss Emma."

Please note, it is highly unlikely Miss Emma is a plump affable middle-aged human tutor with a heart of gold, but rather some kind of hyper-intelligent monitor lizard from Papua New Guinea who communicates with Bindi using a complex combination of tail flicks and text messaging. At best, Miss Emma is a strict but wise orangutan. Australia Zoo only allows four human members of staff on the grounds at the one time, and the merch store requires many human fingers to handle the complex EFTPOS machine.

Thirdly, Terri does not want Bindi to grow up feeling different from other children, even though, you know, Bindi is quite rich, famous, lives in a Zoo, and is completely different from pretty much every other child her age.

Mrs Irwin was left to launch the doll, which plays recorded messages from Bindi, at a New York toy fair alone after organisers banned children.

Bindi and her mother declined a special offer to allow her to attend because other children were unable to see the wonderland of toys.

"They said they would make an exception for Bindi, I said 'No thank you, I don't want Bindi to grow up being the exception'," Mrs Irwin said.

We fear it will be quite impossible to imagine a room full of kids where Bindi wouldn't be considered the odd one out, but whatever. Noble sentiments from Terri Irwin.

Alright, now we must get to the more disturbing aspects of the article.

Bindi saw the dolls, which repeat favourite sayings such as "love it, don't hurt it", on Saturday night in New York and told her mother it was every girl's dream to have their own doll.

Bindi's favourite saying is "love it, don't hurt it"?

We cannot personally come up with anything more horrendous and frightening than the idea of being surprised by a small doll with Bindi Irwin features which repeatedly howls "LOVE IT DON'T HURT IT" in our direction but hey, that's just us.

Bindi's young brother Robert is the only family member not to have a doll, with dolls of Mrs Irwin and her crocodile hunter husband already on sale.

Oh, Bob Bob. You continue to keep it so real. With Bob Bob, it's all about the conservation, you know? Not the trappings of fame like dolls and spin off rap projects (although we still want Bindi to win the ARIA for Best Urban Release this year) and meddling in Britney Spears' troubled life.

Keep on keepin' on, Bob Bob.

Writes Page Six: "WHICH recently divorced fashion editor is rumored to be spending more time in Los Angeles these days? Word is she's taken up with the recently jailed Kiefer Sutherland." That only divorced fashion editor we know is that lady The Devil Wears Prada is based on--Meryl Wintour or whatever. We hope it's not her! [NY Post]

Read More »

With the shocking news that Vanity Fair--traditionally the host of the most extravagant, starfuckiest soirée of Oscar seasons--would not be holding their annual festivities, Hollywood's society set was instantly thrown into turmoil over fears that the entire Oscar party circuit would tumble like Mexican Train Dominoes. Thankfully, those fears were for naught:

Read More »

Another day, another celebushoplifter. But this time it's Britney, y'all! She was spotted on Saturday leaving Fred Segal's in Beverly Hills wearing a $200 black long-sleeved shirt she hadn't paid for. But just when when we were about to accept her into the Winona Ryder School of Hard Knocks (as opposed to the more pedestrian Bai Ling School of Batteries), we read the article a second time and came across this disheartening detail: "She has previously been accused of swiping a disposable lighter from a garage last December and a wig from a sex shop last year." This got us thinking. While we know that we already made a Hedy Lamarr joke last week in reference to Bai Ling's arrest, we think it's high time to to compare and contrast Britney's falling and Hedy's fallen stars.

Read More »

· Variety floated the days-old AICN rumors about The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus this morning. Namely, they re-report that Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell have all signed on to play the role in which Heath Ledger was originally cast. Reps for Cate Blanchett, meanwhile, have yet to confirm her involvement, but it's widely assumed she'll also throw her interpretation into the ring, and walk away with the picture. [Variety]
· The ACE EDDIE Awards give top editing honors to The Bourne Ultimatum and Sweeney Todd. The best reality show editing went to an episode of Cops (for real!), though the winner's acceptance speech was tragically cut short when he triumphantly waved his Golden Scissors trophy above his head and lost his grip. [Variety]

Read More »

Despite the recent appearance of Lindsay Lohan's Sober Face (not to mention her Sober Nipples), there are a few disturbing indications that the Ghosts Of Cokepants Past are re-entering her life. The all-knowing, all-seeing eyes of TMZ caught Lohan enjoying the sabbath with some close friends at Villa last night (we're guessing they weren't watching the NBA All-Star Game). But when it came time to call it an evening, Lindsay's posse pulled a page from the Scooby Doo playbook in an attempt to fool the paparazzi into thinking she had already left the club: namely, they created a diversion.

Read More »

When you think about it, there was really nowhere else for Matthew McConaughey to go with his career besides fragrance pitchman. Having already drained Hollywood of every last romcom spec requiring frequent toplessness of its male lead, the Texan matinee idol is now veering into entirely new multi-million-dollar payout realms to further explore his torso-exposing art.

Read More »

We think most of us are in agreement that Where the Wild Things Are--as far as sacred texts go, basically the Koran of childhood--was in safe hands with Spike Jonze, a filmmaker we fear may have at some point been beaten with a genius stick as hard as Kanye gets it with a shovel in his latest Jonze-helmed music video. (It bears noting that he co-wrote the screenplay with McSweeney's founder/ co-genius Dave Eggers, offering further promise that Things won't follow the same road as any number of Seussian big screen disasters.)

Read More »

Considering that she once celebrated her birthday by hosting parties in five different cities, Paris Hilton has set the bar pretty high when it comes to self-indulgent birthday parties. So when it came time to celebrate her 27th birthday, she did what every slutty heiress would do -- take the stage with The Pussycat Dolls in hooker clothes, of course! But while Hilton played quick change artist (alternating between a "sexy" cop and a a "sexy" lingerie model), there was one newly sober and newly naked star who wasn't allowed to attend the festivities.

Read More »

Ease the bitterness of having to work on President's Day with the knowledge that 1) Grover Cleveland always made his first and second assistants roll calls on Washington's birthday, and 2) the names Roscoe Jenkins, Hanna Montana, and Juno appear nowhere in the weekend box office numbers:

Read More »

Ah, President's Day. We cannot think of a greater way to celebrate the memory of Millard Fillmore and James Garfield than to spend the next ten or fifteen minutes (hours?) rifling through New York's nude photoshoot with Lindsay Lohan. Just last week, we were celebrating Lindsay's new Sober Face, but even we must admit that it pales in comparison to her new Sober Nipples. Which, we might add, are on full display (!) in two of the spread's ten slides. As far as career rejuvenation stunts are concerned, we are predicting that this tastefully titillating homage to Marilyn Monroe's "Last Sitting" is poised to sit alongside Drew Barrymore's role in Poison Ivy in the pantheon of greatest breast-baring comebacks of all-time. A few of the tamer (but still NSFW!) selections follow after the jump; the rest can be found in this week's edition of New York. You have been warned.

Read More »