Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Hell Hath No Fury Like A Spice Girls Fan Scorned
12:52PM Jess McGuire | Parents of Australian children can rest easy – Mel B won’t be appearing onstage scaring their children with saucy tales of clitoral over-stimulation anytime soon, as news emerged over the weekend that the Spice Girls had decided to cancel their Down Under tour plans.
“We’ve had such an amazing time over the last three months,” said the Spice Girls in a statement (we figure they dictated the note in unison). “It’s been incredible being back together and seeing our fans again. We want to thank everyone who came to see us… Really sorry if we didn’t get to see you this time round. We all have other commitments in our lives now but who knows what will happen next.”
The statement teases that the group will be reviewing “options” and muses, “who knows what the future might bring!”? Rumours have been circulating that the group has been offered a huge offer from EMI to record another album, despite the fact that their comeback single “Headlines (Friendship Never Ends)” disappointed on the UK charts.
Regardless, the Girls will not be performing as planned in Australia, Argentina, and China.
As the brilliant No Rock and Roll Fun put it – Spice Girls discover ‘family’ more attractive than ‘half empty halls’
Those “other commitments” in the Spice Girls’ lives – what would they actually be, then? Is the Australian Dancing With The Stars refusing to take ‘no’ for an answer from Geri? Has Mel B decided she needs to drive up and down Eddy Murphy’s street bellowing DNA test results? Is Victoria thinking that, damn it all, 2008 is the year she needs to finally tackle Anthony Powell’s A Dance To The Music Of Time, and no excuses?
Australian fans are apparently taking the news rather badly.
Outraged Australian fans have lashed out at the Spice Girls after the group scrapped plans to tour Down Under.
“I am absolutely disgusted in them,” a fan named Charm said. “Most of us have been waiting years for this and they have just ruined it all for us. As far as I am concerned, they have just lost another fan. So much for girl power.”
Some branded the group liars.
“They have known all along when their kids go to school or whatever,” Stace88 said. “It’s a crappy excuse, really it’s all just about money … they’ve made enough now so who cares about anywhere else right?” Fans said they were upset that promoters kept promising concert dates. “How dare they get our hopes up by sending emails asking us how many tickets we wanted,” Ezzy B said.
On the social networking site Facebook, two groups have started recruiting members, Spice Girls Suck for cancelling tour to Australia and Spice Girls Dogged Australia. Also circulating on the web is a picture of the group holding up a sign – “We Lie”.
The website SpiceNews.com, which has been running since 1998, announced it was closing down.
“I can’t support people who I don’t respect, and I don’t respect people who plainly screw over and lie to their fans, that being the Spice Girls,” the site’s administrator said.
Ballsy move, Spice Girls. Personally, we’d never toy with the emotions of Ezzy B, Charm, and Stace88.
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Who Else Has Matt Damon Been Fucking?
12:20PM Mark | As a couple of different people have now pointed this out to us, we feel compelled to share: Before Matt Damon was fucking Sarah Silverman, he was all over Scotty’s ladyfriend in Eurotrip. [via Lindsayism] · Robert De Niro has come down with Obamamania. · Learn all about new Britney Spears lawyer Adam Streisand’s not-so-secret connection to another, much more famous Streisand! Yes, it’s the one you’re thinking of! Turner Classic Movies dares the WGA to stay on strike. More »
Is 20th Century Fox Already Cooling On M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘The Happening’?
12:03PM Mark Graham | There are two ways of looking at 20th Century Fox’s decision not to air an ad for The Happening during the Super Bowl last night (the trailer debuted online today). The first is that the company made a financially savvy decision by choosing not to blow $2.7 million dollars on a thirty-second advertisement (like all those other studios did). The other is that the studio is feeling a bit gunshy on the financial prospects of Night’s first film since the unmitigated disaster that was Lady In The Water. And as for which theory we think holds more water? We’re going with the latter. More »
Report: Oprah Winfrey Network Deal Forces CAA Death Star To Devour One Of Its Own
11:45AM Seth | Life behind the gleaming walls of the CAA Death Star, it should hardly surprise you to hear, is not all baby-buffets and games: Being the most powerful agenting force in the universe means that daily, high-stakes deals negotiated by employees with Vader-sized ambitions will occasionally require the building to fold in on itself and munch on one of its own. Which is precisely what happened to TV packager Michael Camacho after getting his hands a little to deeply inside the Oprahphagus. From Deadline Hollywood Daily: More »
Oscar Hopefuls Lunch Together, Daring To Dream The Academy Awards Won’t Be Canceled After All
11:15AM Mark | Earlier this afternoon, the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences welcomed awards hopefuls to its annual luncheon, where nominees are free to mingle with both colleagues and competitors in a low-pressure environment, enjoy a delicious meal, and generally bask in the glow of their potential Oscar glory. Perhaps infected with the giddy spirit of cautious optimism spreading through the industry following the new round of rumors about an impending, Oscars-salvaging deal between the WGA and AMPTP, today’s event seemed like little more than a high-wattage nice-off to see who could offer the most vigorous reacharound to his or her peers, according to the LAT:
Diablo Cody’s Next Catchphrase? ‘Fried Bologna Is The Bomb!’
11:07AM Mark Graham | Although we did recently declare a temporary moratorium on burger phone jokes, it is worth noting that a blogger who goes by the handle of Big Ross recently got his hands on a copy of Diablo Cody’s first post-Juno script, entitled Jennifer’s Body. Megan Fox (Transformers) and director Karyn Kusama (Aeon Flux) are attached to the horror/thriller about a cheerleader who somehow becomes possessed by a demonic spirt which compels her to start offing all of the dudes at her high school. And while we haven’t actually seen the script ourselves, from what Big Ross describes, we feel pretty safe declaring that Diablo’s streak of consecutive Oscar nominations will come to an end at one. More »
Can We Just Put The ‘There Will Be Blood’ Homoeroticism Issue On The Table Already?
10:33AM Seth | [Warning: Some spoilers ahead.] There’s been an ongoing There Will Be Blood debate over here at Defamer HQ, with one faction having emerged from the P.T. Anderson masterpiece convinced what we had just witnessed wasn’t just a searing allegory encapsulating the epochal struggle between American capitalism and religion, but also some very kinky oil-prospector-daddy on boy-of-the-cloth goings-on. (OK, fine. That faction was us.) More »
YouTube Clip Of The Day
9:52AM Jess McGuire | Continuing with our love of slightly camp children on YouTube, we offer you the following performance piece titled “He is a Princess!”
The bit where he’s standing in front of the mirror playing with his skirt makes us feel as though we’re quietly spying on a youth as they come to grips with their somewhat kinky side. There appears to be a storyline involved in this clip but we aren’t really sure of what it is, other than that the somewhat dowdier (but still in women’s clothing) version of the boy seems bored by his more flamboyant self’s antics. We also note the lyrics in the Cascada soundtrack – “You cheated on my from behind”
Commenter hypernessncandy is unimpressed, declaring “is he thinks hes such a girl, lets see him try to do a split”. Touche. More » 
Resourceful Jay Leno Hangs On To Audience Through Shameless Recycling Of Old Material
9:24AM Mark | Despite seemingly insurmountable handicaps–the loss of his striking writers, an inability to find guests willing to risk being considered WGA-undermining picket-line crossers, and a hated timeslot nemesis working at full strength due to his own Guild side-deal, Jay Leno has, amazingly, continued to win the battle of late night since everyone returned to work in early January. Today’s NY Times attempts to unlock the secrets of Leno’s crazy-making success, noting that despite the lower quality of available seat-fillers, he’s been able to do the same show he’s always done by maintaining his usual output of tepid monologue jokes. Asked about Leno’s ability to crank out dozens of gags per night without the benefit of his absent staff, defenders cite his impressive talent for passing off his stale, unfunny material as fresh: More »
