Callea And Campbell Dine Together Publicly, Resist The Urge To Have Hot Gay Sex; Press Scratches Head And Wonders What The Hell Is Going On

Despite now both being self-confessed homosexualists, it seems Anthony Callea and Tim Campbell are still resisting their natural need to do impure things to each other, preferring to do lunch at cafes to simply doing each other. But they both have penises! DOESN’T THIS MEAN THEY HAVE TO TAKE TURNS BUMMING EACH OTHER IN A TOILET BLOCK?

Good lord. If the people of Australia can’t depend on stereotypes to explain what’s going on in the world, what can they depend on? Nothing.

Pop prince Anthony Callea and former Home and Away heartthrob Tim Campbell insist they’re just mates.

But the pair continued to strengthen their friendship over lunch at a Williamstown eatery.

A spy said the twosome – who are out and proud (and single) – hid from onlookers at the back of the Atomic cafe, concealing their faces behind caps.

Concealing their faces eh? Because their faces were covered in each other’s mangunk? HUH? IS THAT WHAT HAPPENED?

Or, you know, maybe they just like being friends and talking about boys and eating salads and bitching about David Campbell and they’d prefer it if the eyes of the media weren’t constantly following them, waiting for one to jump the other’s bones.