Saturday, December 6, 2008
We Think She About To Pull Some’n Outta Her Pants!
11:18AM Seth | There’s just four more days until MTV premieres their latest bisexual dating show, A Double Shot at Love, starring the “Ikky Twins” Rikki and Vikki. In the sneak peek above, Vikki admits she’s the twin with a dick. Throw something on Kanye’s stage, you just might have inadvertently inspired his newest NSFW hit. Fox’s The Secret Millionaire is caught in a phony phony-poor-person check-giveaway scheme. Boy George was found guilty of Norwegianhustlernapping today. As his punishment, he will be required to—slurrrrrrrrrrrrrrp. Slurrrrrp. Slrrrrr. Sl. Slll. Sl. OK, where were we? Oh right, Boy George’s sentence. No word yet. “‘It is a reverse Punk’d,’ says Fox President of Alternative Entertainment Mike Darnell. “‘Instead of the worst day of your life and then a joke at the end, this is the reverse. This is the best day of your life, and then we arrest you.’” Hey—McDonald’s went with Sterling Cooper’s campaign idea. WTG, Peggy Olson! Wow—that one uninjured dog sure must be hungry. Bronx Mowgli Wentz, ca. 2032. More »
Cate Blanchett Closes In On Erik Estrada With Walk Of Fame Star
10:45AM Seth | The Curious Case of Benjamin Button star Cate Blanchett was awarded with that most exclusive of all Hollywood decorations presented within spitting distance of a technicolor-wig store, the Walk of Fame star. There to share in the honour were producer Kathleen Kennedy, Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull director Steven Spielberg, and begoateed Button director himself David Fincher, who in his prepared statement likened Blanchett’s luminous beauty and staggering talent to “my second rimjob. My first wasn’t so hot, but the second one, I was like, ‘OK—I think I get it. Yeah—this is pretty awesome.’ That’s how I feel about Cate Blanchett. I just get it, and I think she’s pretty awesome.” [Photo credit: Getty Images] More »
Money Man Ryan Kavanaugh’s Next Funding Project: A Drunk Driving Defence
10:08AM STV | Here’s a Doomsday holdover for anyone who thinks today is going a little too conveniently well: Ryan Kavanaugh, the film financier whose Relativity Media interests intersect heavily with Universal, Sony and pretty much anyone else making films in Hollywood right now, will be arraigned next week on speeding and drunk driving charges dating back to October. His arrest was his second since 2006, when he previously sideswiped a Malibu police cruiser. And that would be a probation violation; do they allow development meetings in jail? More »
Jeff Zucker Sends Out ‘You’re Fired Unless Your Name Is Ben Silverman’ All-Staff NBC Memo
9:45AM Seth | “‘They call her the black widow. Every program she touches turns to death,’ growled our source. ‘She is on very thin ice.’” That was how Page Six described Universal Media Studio President Katherine Pope (pictured) last month in a suspiciously positioned item foisting blame for the network’s disastrous string of recent offerings—shows like Bionic Woman, My Own Worst Enemy, Lipstick Librarians, and freshly squeezed lemon Knight Rider—on her fetchingly exposed shoulders. Nikki Finke accuses Silverman of having leaked the items himself (”that’s one of the fringe benefits of his selling his Reveille to Elisabeth Murdoch and yachting with her this summer”) in her analysis of today’s shakeup that saw not just Pope’s exit, but that of NBC Entertainment EVP Teri Weinberg, as well. (Weinberg was the D-girl Silverman brought over from Reveille who was later discovered in the compromising position technically referred to in the business as shtupping your showrunner. Because no one ever fucks anyone they work with in Hollywood—ever.) More »
Ch-Ch-Ch, Ah-Ah-Ah: ‘Friday the 13th’ Remake Reveals 13 Ways to Creatively Die
9:15AM Kyle Buchanan | Before he works his way up to the Hitchcockian classics, Michael Bay is determined to tackle some more lowbrow cinematic remakes, and so it is that we have this newly released full trailer for the upcoming Platinum Dunes re-do of Friday the 13th. Directed by Marcus Nispel, who also helmed the Bay-produced remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre (and apparently hasn’t exhausted his “attractively lit stabbing” jollies yet), it’s the tale of a murderous hockey player who suffers a six-game suspension for slandering Elisha Cuthbert, which leaves him plenty of time to slice and dice teenagers up at Camp Crystal Lake. And, in a loving homage to the original film’s trailer, Nispel has made sure that every single “kill” is teased and tabulated on-screen. The clip, after the jump: More »
8:48AM Seth | Plan B-List. Were the last words you said to your laid-off assistant as he carried a cardboard box of personal effects out the doors of your office for the very last time, “I cannot BELIEVE they cut $US25 million from my budget! What the fuck is the world coming to? We’re screwed!!!” Fret not: Your tentpole might not have collapsed just yet. Empire has a list of perfectly serviceable alternative to costly A-list stars—some even arguably less box-office-poisony than the originals! [Empire] More »
Joe Satriani Sues Coldplay For Ownership of Year’s Most Annoying Melody
8:34AM STV | Grammy Hell mascots Coldplay have pissed off yet another music listener with their anthem “Viva La Vida,” but Joe Satriani won’t settle for just turning off the noise. In a copyright infringement suit filed Thursday in L.A., the wanky virtuoso alleges that he actually wrote the noise. The evidence (such as it were) follows the jump. More »
Put Sigourney Weaver in ‘Ghostbusters 3,’ or ‘Alien 5′ Gets It!
7:44AM Kyle Buchanan | Now that talk on a possible, long-gestating Ghostbusters sequel is heating up, MTV spoke to Sigourney Weaver about her potential involvement (when will someone call Peter MacNicol? We’re dying over here!). Weaver admitted that she’s supposed to call Bill Murray next week about the project, adding, “I would hope that my little [movie son] Oscar would be one of the Ghostbusters even if I’m not in it!” Careful, Sigourney — you’re giving producers some Seth Rogen casting suggestions. Weaver also revealed that she’s been talking to Ridley Scott about a potentially radical overhaul of the Alien franchise: More »
7:12AM STV | Hollywood PrivacyWatch: 12/4 — I was cruising home and decided to stop off to check out some of the sales at the 3rd Street festival. A limo was parked outside of the clothing store Milk, and when I walked in to peruse the racks, a film crew had set up in the back near the dressing rooms. LUDACRIS was shooting some type of commercial, and the director kept telling him to walk in and out of the dressing room and act like “this is the best pair of jeans you’ve ever put on in your life! You look GREAT!” [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.] More »
