Short Ends: Taking Our Homie’s Weed

· We bestow the Defamer Medal of Heroism upon Dr. Mark Lowe, who helped save the life of a man shot point blank in the middle of a crowded Colorado Blvd. in Old Town Pasadena last night, and whose clinical emphasis on the word “weed” we’ve now savored approximately two dozen times.
· For the love of God, we beg you not to click on this photo of Keith Richards Photoshopped to have two mouths where his eyes should be. Please! Don’t! We beg of you!
· The LAT has a list about all the reasons they–gasp!–hate end-of-year lists.
· Well, whatever, LAT. We love lists. Particularly the AFI’s annual Moments of Significance, which, uh…celebrate the significant moments of our lives? “The Hollywood writers strike, the iPhone and the ‘hyper-tabloidization’ of television news” top this year’s list.
· Eddie Murphy is reportedly set to “wed any minute now in the South Pacific.” That smashing sound is a hundred 4 a.m. Yukon Mining Co. patrons’ hearts shattering.