December 12, 2007

 

Fear Not, Danielle Spencer Enthusiasts - Rusty's Missus Is Returning To The Music World

Australian Post Posted by Jess McGuire at 6:10 PM on December 12, 2007

Being huge fans of the musical works produced by the Nana Glen massive (another slice of White Monkey's "stark moodiness"? $49.95 for '1 used & new'? Don't mind if we do!), we were thrilled to learn the other day that Danielle Spencer hasn't ditched her burgeoning career as a songstress to focus on giving birth to Russell Crowe's offspring.

Says smh.com.au -

Her husband may be in the spotlight as an Oscar-winning star, but Danielle Spencer hasn't forgotten her own creative career - she is planning to record new songs for an independent album.

Spencer, who has two young sons with Russell Crowe, was working on a full-length studio album before she became pregnant with her youngest boy Tennyson, now 17 months. The project was put on hold but it seems the singer is now working on new material.

An insider has revealed Spencer has started penning new tracks in the hope of releasing an album early next year. The vocalist, who is warm and charismatic in person, has so far avoided following in the footsteps of her father, Don Spencer, a prolific recorder of children's albums.

This reminds us - long ago we (along with a couple of clever housemates) planned on launching an online serial called 'The Nana Glen Diaries', which would feature heartwarming - and occasionally heartrending - fictional journal entries penned from the perspective of Russ, Danielle, and eventually wee Charlie and Tennyson. We'll add it to our ongoing List Of Things To Actually Follow Through With Before We Die.

Jules Lund Delights Austereo And Listeners With Hilarious Tale Of Drink Spiking

Australian Post Posted by Clem Bastow at 1:59 PM on December 12, 2007

Lund_Jules.jpgWe've always thought Jules Lund to be a fine, upstanding young man.

There's just something about that slightly hysterical laughter, boys' room jokes and forced, cheesy smile (not to mention the tan) that just screams "Mr Smith, I have nothing but good intentions for your daughter - also, I bought your wife this kitten. Now, where are those ducklings that need to be nursed back to safety?"

Well, he's been given a talking-to from Austereo after telling - on-air - the hilarious story about how he spiked a groom-to-be's drink at a bucks' night.

What a champeen! Lundy, maaaate!

On Monday, the Getaway reporter told of his brother's weekend buck's turn in Melbourne, which involved dressing the groom-to-be in a tight Superman outfit before his drink was spiked with Viagra by a member of the party.

Listeners of national breakfast radio show Summer Fling then heard how a scantily dressed woman entertained the group and the buck apparently suffered from the Viagra effects.

Australian National Council on Drugs executive officer Gino Vumbaca warned the prank could have had disastrous consequences.

"No one wants to be the fun police, but the fact remains that Viagra and other pharmaceutical drugs can have very serious side effects and can interact with other drugs," he said.

You know what would have been really hilarious? If the groom had suddenly been overcome with the desire to bum Jules. Or if he'd had a heart attack! That would've been so funny, can't you just imagine Jules cracking up as he attempts to tell the bride-to-be that her husband died while dicking a stripper?

Jules Lund for media personality of the year!

Was Delta's Postmodern Mermaid Fantasy Inspired By Madonna's Postmodern Desert Shaman Fantasy?

Australian Post Posted by Clem Bastow at 1:32 PM on December 12, 2007

deltmads.jpgSo we finally managed to watch all of Delta's expensive, special-effects-laden video for her latest single Believe Again, and were struck by how - once you reach the 2:55-minute mark - you could be forgiven for feeling a very strong sense of deja vu. In short, it looks like Delts' cash-happy videographers have been tooling around in the Madonna back catalogue, specifically, her spooky, Chris Cunningham-directed video for Frozen.

Now, we might be overreacting, so here's an example to whet your sleuthy appetites; hop over the jump for a few more 'compare and contrast' screen shots.


delta madonna 3.jpg

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We Can't Think Of A Knob-related Pun We Can Make With The Words 'Armani' or 'Beckham'

Australian Post Posted by Clem Bastow at 10:30 AM on December 12, 2007

BECKHAM101207_468x342.jpgDavid Beckham has brought an early Christmas to motorists and magazine-readers everywhere by starring in the latest campaign for Giorgio Armani underwear - and how!

In fact, such is the majesty of Becks' packed lunch, the UK press is speculating that it may not in fact be all his.

The former England captain stares sternly from the poster as if defying anyone to suggest a little computer enhancement might have contributed to the chiselled six-pack or, indeed, to any other parts of his striking physique.

...His spokesman was less forthcoming about the posters. Asked if the images had been enhanced to give Beckham a greater appeal, he replied: “No comment.”

In comparison, when he wore similar white trunks on holiday off Italy's Ligurian coast 18 months ago, he just did not seem to fill them as well.


Uhh... we've been trying to think of something to say in witty riposte to this story, but all our brains seem to be coming up with is "DO YOU WANT BIG PEN1S? Males from around the world who participated, the average gain after 5 months of taking ManSter pills was 3.02 Inches! YOUR GIRLFRIEND WILL THINK U R 5PERM FOUNTAIN!!1"

You can see why our doctor recommended some time away from the computer this holiday season.

News.com.au's 'Most Clicked' Stories Of 2007 Reveals Readers Uninterested In Politics, Want To Know About Aliens And Levitation

Australian Post Posted by Clem Bastow at 10:20 AM on December 12, 2007

Our favourite future Walkley Award-winning online news portal, News.com.au, has revealed the list of its 100 "most clicked" stories of 2007.

As you can imagine for a news source of such quality, it's a serious affair, filled with tales of bravery, tragedy and innovation, scientific breakthroughs and touching stories of human interest.

Here are some of our favourites:


84. 11-year-old boy gave STD to young girls
72. Marcia Brady’s lesbian sex romp with TV sister
54. Britney Spears 'strips off in porn shop'
48. Live spider flushed from boy's ear
45. Man murdered parents with axe for laughing at cat’s death
29. Chinese army harvesting body parts
18. Gingers extinct in 100 years say scientists
12. Mother beat shark with camera
11. Czech crash victim wakes up speaking English
6. Roswell aliens theory revived by deathbed confession
5. Man levitates outside the Whitehouse

With a smorgasbord of riches such as the ones we've just quoted, it was quite disappointing to get to #1 and find that it was nothing more exciting than simply "Paris Hilton loses inheritance".

However, it's good to see that the sadly deceased Weekly World News is alive and well in the hearts and browsers of everyday Australians.

Christmas, The Sneaky Sound System Way

Australian Post Posted by Clem Bastow at 10:02 AM on December 12, 2007

SSS.jpgWhile you are scrounging in your pockets, while buying Christmas presents and food, for your last $50, spare a thought for those poor bastards in Sneaky Sound System.

The struggling independent musos are having a rough time of it at this most special time of the year, playing gigs where they can and hoping they'll be able to put some food on the table come December 25th. It's...

Oh, you'll just have to read on, we can't take any more of this tragedy!

The Christmas bonus has come early for Sydney band Sneaky Sound System, who are understood to have stuffed their stockings with profits of up to $200,000 from the corporate functions circuit.

It's a case of weddings, parties anything for the hot dance act, who have spent the last week reaping the big bucks for adding funky festive cheer to corporate Christmas bashes around the city.

More than 300 clients of financial services firm Goldman Sachs JBWere were treated to a 40 minute set by the ARIA award winning performers at a no-expenses spared bash held at Mrs Macquarie's chair last Wednesday night.

The band's manager Amber Zada pulled out the violins when the Confidential team tried to winkle any further corporate coin chasing out of her, saying "we're an independent act - we don't have a record company writing out cheques so we do what is necessary to keep funding the band's future."

Oh, cry us all a river! ARIA awards and a sack full of used $50 notes? Christmas is cancelled!

Invasion Of The Location Snatchers

Australian Post Posted by Clem Bastow at 9:29 AM on December 12, 2007

Steven Spielberg's megabucks HBO miniseries The Pacific has been filming down around the You Yangs in Victoria for some time now, but it's only recently started to impinge on the lives of suburban Melbournians - and how!

In addition to filming at Melbourne High School and along the banks of the Yarra in the last few days, just yesterday Rathdowne Street in Carlton North was closed off as trucks, crew, a bunch of 1940s cars and a few false shop-fronts descended on the busy shopping strip.

Our spies noted with glee that the production team had chosen the grodiest share-house terrace to tizz up for a scene of what is sure to be heartrending dialogue between a young GI and - presumably - his sweetheart, who were shot sitting on the steps of said share-house, which has never looked tidier.

And then, just like that - i.e. about two and a half hours later - they were all gone. Hop over the jump for our "exclusive" spy shots, captured with Mata Hari-esque sleuthiness by Defamer spies carrying camera phones.

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We Cannot Be The Only Ones To Suddenly Feel Overwhelmed By A Deep Desire To Party With Nigel Scullion

Australian Post Posted by Jess McGuire at 9:00 AM on December 12, 2007

Long ago, a British pop group claimed there "ain't no party like an S-Club party" - folks, they were wrong. Truly trumping S-Club 7's invigorating brand of knees-uppery, Nigel Scullion has proven there "ain't no party like a National party... deputy!" and we fully applaud him for refusing to apologise for his colourful past.

The National party's new deputy leader Nigel Scullion has revealed that being stripped to his underpants and handcuffed to a pole in a sleazy Russian nightclub was one of the best nights of his life.

AND WHY WOULDN'T IT BE?

Nige, you ol' dog, please share with us your tale of debauchery and mischief.

"It was 10 years ago, but I still remember it - I'm not someone who gets so drunk I can't remember," he said.

"I was out drinking with some international fishing mates of mine back when I was a fisherman myself.

"If you ever get an offer to go drinking with Icelandic whalers and Canadian crab fishermen, take them up on it."

Already this is proving educational. Whenever we are approached by Icelandic whalers and Canadian crab fishermen and asked if we'd like to hit the town with them, we always say no. We feel like a bloody fool! But enough about us, we must continue with Nigel's story...

"I don't know what the story says - let me be clear about that. But if it says I was chained to a pole on stage, then sure, I'm guilty.

"At one stage or another, we all got up on the stage."

He described the night out as a "big get together with mates".

"It was a standard bar over there, and I suppose you could call it a sleazy bar."

Senator Scullion said he fled the nightclub after a brawl erupted.

"At some stage, a fight broke out, so we all got up and left," he said.

"But I was fully dressed when that happened."

Note the keywords there, folks. "I was fully dressed... WHEN THAT HAPPENED!" Which means he definitely got nakie on stage. Definitely.

Nigel Scullion, Defamer Australia salutes you.

Tim Campbell Announces He's Gay, Denies Being Part Of Australia's First Showbiz Superhomo Couple

Australian Post Posted by Jess McGuire at 8:55 AM on December 12, 2007

Yes, it appears to be true. "The ginge you could definitely fuck", Tim Campbell - star of the musical Shout! - will only make your ranga love making dreams come true if you are packing penis. He's out! He's proud! We fucking love him even more than before!

Channel 7 star Tim Campbell has publicly come out to announce he is gay. The former Home and Away actor exclusively told The Advertiser about his sexuality....

"There's nothing in the way of being ashamed about this (but) the label thing worries me a bit because I don't want my work to be affected," he says.

"If every time I'm written about now it's as 'the gay actor' it would bore the hell out of me.

"Coming out at 20 changed me a bit, but at 32, I'm pretty comfortable with who I am and what I'm doing."

Good for you, Tim. But what of Werribee's most successful midget?

Tim reckons both he and Anthony have each broken up with their partners and for now, are just friends.

"(Anthony and I) are mates - he's had his rough trot, I'm going through a rough trot and I'm really concerned for my (ex) partner," Tim says.

Look, Tim. It'd really mean a lot to us if you'd just hook up. Why? Well, there are a number of reasons but the main two would be...

i) We love the idea of the nation's blue-rinse set having a couple of Calamites to love and adore as their very own. We envision touching duets during Carols By Candlelight, photo spreads in Australian Women's Weekly, and perhaps even a reality show? The grannies will lap it up, and you'll do more for gay rights in this country than the success of both Queer Eye and Will & Grace combined.

ii) For fuck's sake, someone has to keep Callea safe from Perez Hilton. AUSTRALIA EXPECTS YOU TO DO YOUR DUTY, CAMPBELL! TAKE HIM TO THE TAN, THEN JUST TAKE HIM!

Fictional Female Character In Fag Hag Shock!

Australian Post Posted by Jess McGuire at 8:55 AM on December 12, 2007

Hmmm... we can't help but suspect News Ltd may have been clutching at straws when it came to their attempt to lure readers from the front page of the website to an article about George Michael's appearance on a television show.

The story is promoted with the words "By George, he's gay - Which female tried to bed the openly gay George Michael? Click here to find out..." Naturally, we were chomping at the bit to discover which desperate lady celebrity decided to throw logic out the window and have a crack at Britain's favourite cottaging enthusiast.

Then we discovered it was all a canny ruse..

After managing to convince the-then British Prime Minister Tony Blair to play the fool for a sketch, comedian Catherine Tate attempts to achieve the unthinkable once more - by bedding George Michael.

Admittedly it's all for her Christmas special, where the popular funny lady is clearly keen to show Michael's humorous side.

Goddamn it. We're gutted. We were hoping for some shameless haggery.

Now we suppose the only thing left for us to find out in this somewhat pointless piece is whether George Michael's appearance on a comedy show was actually funny.

"It's very funny," the source added.

Well, we suppose that's that then.

(dusts off hands)

Queen Latifah Urges Fans Not To Send Their Lesbian-Wedding Gifts Just Yet

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 8:30 AM on December 12, 2007

lati-wedding.jpgHaving, like the rest of us, caught wind of a story circulating that Queen Latifah was finally going to make an honest woman out of her longtime personal-training companion, a Sun Times reporter at a junket for The Perfect Holiday gathered the nerve to ask the actress/torch singer/hip-hop architect whether the rumours were true:

I did ask Queen Latifah for reaction to recent tabloid gossip that she allegedly was going to wed her long-time female personal trainer.

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Little Interests Us Less Than The Contents Of Jennifer "Jen-Pez" Lopez's Uterus

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 8:15 AM on December 12, 2007

lopez-rm.jpgBut when the items on her super-double-top-secret baby gift registry are shockingly! revealed ("We don't talk about any of our clients," says the publicity-shy owner of celebrity-infant-spoiling concern La Petit Tresor with a conspiratorial wink), we take notice. $350 cashmere outfits! $3,500 carriages! The proposed building of standalone nursery-mansions on the grounds of the star's many sprawling estates, each lavishly decorated by the boutique's design consultants! We can hardly wait for Lopez to pop out her twins directly onto the cover of People, allowing us all a first look at all the fun things Jen's besties bought for the tykes. [Rush & Molloy]

PETA Attacks The Olsen Twins For Their Fur-Loving Sins

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 8:00 AM on December 12, 2007

Usually, when PETA is determined to make a dramatic statement about animal abuse, it dispatches Pamela Anderson to march in front of a food-court KFC stall, naked but for the blood-soaked feathers of brutally massacred chickens clinging to her iconic, surgically enhanced curves, a protest that lasts until every potential patron is finally forced to take their business to a nearby Tofu Hut. Today, however, the organisation has undertaken a decidedly more ambitious campaign, unloading both outraged barrels on the Olsen Twins, who've made the unfortunate choice to include items containing animal fur in their signature homeless-chic fashion line.Above, we've excerpted the safe-for-work part of their "Full House of Horrors" video, in which a character named Futureman travels back through sitcom time to warn the Tanner clan about the mink-hating monster they're raising, but you'll have to hit PETA's full version to see what grisly fate befalls the cute critter on their TV.

Humane Society Coming After Paris Hilton's Puppy-Pushers

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:45 AM on December 12, 2007

The Humane Society is teasing the imminent release of their investigative report on the pet stores and puppy mills that keep Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie and their animal-collecting ilk supplied with a fresh, fashionable accessory-chihuahua each time they stroll down the red carpet for the latest mobile-phone launch. The teaser trailer the Society posted to its blog is chillingly effective: not only do we expect to be appalled by their trip to one of L.A.'s most popular pet-pushing emporiums, but we're hoping their i-team, disguised as Les Deux patrons in search of a hot after-party, somehow managed to infiltrate Hilton's compound and obtain footage of the walk-in closet where a colony of neglected pups survives on a diet of high-end shoe leather and the contents of discarded water bottles. Stay tuned!

Secrets Of Sacha Baron Cohen's 'Sweeney Todd' Package Revealed!

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:40 AM on December 12, 2007

cohen-todd.jpgOf the many surprises in Sweeney Todd, Tim Burton's musical ode to early-Victorian cannibalism, the appearance of Sacha Baron Cohen as barber rival Adolfo Pirelli is the one of the most pleasant: The British comedian ably tackles the part's considerable vocal challenges, and cuts a fine figure in a form-fitting, periwinkle dandy suit, beneath which protrudes a bulge even more distractingly prominent than the one poking out of Borat's signature neon nutthong swimwear. E Online's Planet Gossip caught up with the movie's costume designer to find out where nature ended and package-enhancing magic began:

"Oh, that was the real thing," Sweeney Todd's two-time Oscar-winning costume designer Colleen Atwood told me the other day with a giggle, but quickly admitting, "Yeah, we augmented."

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Report: Steven Spielberg And Sumner Redstone's Love Might Be Fading

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:35 AM on December 12, 2007

redstone-spielberg.jpgPerhaps the only Hollywood marriage more troubled than that of the Writers Guild and the studios is the turbulent union between the DreamWorks team and the well-monied Paramount lovers into whose welcoming embrace Steven Spielberg and David Geffen happily threw themselves two Christmases ago. Though Viacom CEO Philippe Dauman's public celebration of Spielberg as "the greatest filmmaker - nay, the greatest human being - of all time" seemed like it might be an attempt to save their ill-fated partnership, Radar passes along the latest "Steven is so out of there" chatter:

"He's gone, and he's not going to be missed," one knowledgeable insider tells Radar. Word is, Viacom chief Sumner Redstone - who made headlines in 2006 for canning Tom Cruise after his off-screen antics became a liability - has struck again.

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Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:30 AM on December 12, 2007

evel-mcconaughey.jpg"He lived. He lived well, he lived hard. He lived strong, he lived full-throttle. He's forever in flight now. And you know what? He doesn't have to come back down! He doesn't have to land." With those moving words, a surprisingly eloquent Matthew McConaughey sent Evel Knievel, the greatest daredevil of them all, off to jump the biggest motorcycle ramp in Heaven. [LiveVideo.com]

Trade Roundup: Penn, Pitt Basking In The Year-End Love Of Film Critics

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:15 AM on December 12, 2007

· Sean Penn's Into the Wild leads the Broadcast Critics Association awards nominations with seven nods, including best picture, director, actor, and writer. Meanwhile, the contrarian critics of San Francisco name Brad Pitt's little-seen outlaw-tone-poem The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford their best of the year. [Variety, Variety

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Lawsuit Forces David Chase To Be Way More Forthcoming With Sopranos' Beginning Than He Was With Their Ending

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 7:00 AM on December 12, 2007

david-chase.jpgThe Sopranos creator David Chase, who once dismissed the series's fans as an unruly mob of closure-obsessed Tony-turncoats, has made the pilgrimage back to his old stomping grounds to testify in a federal lawsuit brought against him from a former judge who claims he was never fairly compensated for helping to create the now-legendary series:

David Chase, the creator of "The Sopranos," returns this week to New Jersey to testify in a federal case brought against him by a former judge who claims he helped create the HBO series and has never been compensated for his work.

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Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 6:45 AM on December 12, 2007

stolz-mcfly.jpgAs Back to the Future fans probably already know, Eric Stoltz completed weeks of filming as Marty McFly due to a scheduling conflict with first choice Michael J. Fox, but was eventually replaced by Fox when Stoltz proved a little intense for a light-hearted comedy. To celebrate Stoltz's unseen contribution to cinematic history, Hurty Elbow has constructed a mini-shrine to the original McFly's lost scenes. Don't miss the cameo by a young Billy Zane! [Hurty Elbow]

Adam Sandler To The Rescue At Culver Ice Arena

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 6:40 AM on December 12, 2007

sandler.jpgBecause we're all desperately in need of some stories of spiritual uplift this dismal holiday season, we offer you an eyewitness account from a highly placed Defamer operative of box office titan and "Hanukkah Song" troubadour Adam Sandler coming to the rescue of an injured woman in the parking lot of local skating rink:

A big sighting on Friday, December 7 @ the Culver Ice Arena, LA's most decrepit skating facility. The place was overrun with high school burnouts and geeks with nothing better to do. So, it was fitting then that Adam Sandler should show up with wife and small child in tow.

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Brave Fox Exec Lets Assistants Play Around With His Midseason Schedule A Little Bit

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 6:30 AM on December 12, 2007

unhitched.jpgWhile most industry executives are content to let their assistants carry out their primary functions - lying to unwanted callers about their current whereabouts, caffeinated-beverage procurement, Blackberry target practice - without a second thought as to how they might be utilised in less brain-numbing tasks, progressive Fox scheduling guru Preston Beckman recently offered his underlings a chance to partake in the TV-magic-making process in a meaningful way. Briefly freeing the assistants from their chains, he invited his young staffers, who conveniently fell within the demographic sweet spot midseason sitcom Unhitched is targeting and wouldn't require the $50 stipend he'd otherwise have to waste on focus group cattle, to help him solve a problem. Reports Variety :

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Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 3:35 AM on December 12, 2007

dubrow-blow.jpgABC News.com has reviewed the toxicology report from Quiet Riot vocalist Kevin DuBrow's mysterious death in Las Vegas in late November, passing along their expert analysis of the Clark County coroner's verdict: TOO MUCH BLOW. This result updates the news site's earlier, speculative story about suspicions that drug-induced asphyxiation was responsible for the singer's demise: DUBROW: CHOKED ON OWN PUKE? [ABCNews.com]

Breaking!

Posted by Defamer Hollywood at 3:00 AM on December 12, 2007

trebek-attack.jpgLovably smug Jeopardy quizmaster Alex Trebek suffers heart attack! But please, don't begin the search for a new host just yet (note to Ryan Seacrest: it would be in poor taste to offer your services "just in case he takes a turn for the worse") , as Trebek merely suffered a "minor" infarction and is "resting comfortably." Check back with ET for further developments on how the temporarily felled gameshow legend is enjoying Cedar-Sinai's legendary tapioca pudding. [ET Online]

Categories/Tags: Alex Trebek