Moving House An Indignity Even To Supermodels

Having to pack up all your possessions and move house is one of life’s least pleasant activities, particularly when you’re worried the buff blokes hired to lift your heavy objects might cop an eyeful of your S&M gear/Richard Clayderman record collection/commode/lifetime supply of Depends.

Well, spare a thought for Kate Moss, who is currently shifting home base, and whose stained mattress – don’t we all have one of them, even if only metaphorically? – made it into the tabloids as it wobbled outside her soon-to-be vacated Notting Hill abode.

An onlooker said: “I doubt Kate was best pleased everyone caught a glimpse of her dirty mattress.

“There was a definite big brown mark.”

Hopefully it’s got nothing to do with the anal incontinence issues that may have plagued ex-BF Pete Doherty and more to do with, er, eating a romantic dinner in bed with new squeeze Jamie Hince.

Either that or it’s Ms Moss who needs a lifetime supply of Depends.