Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Celebrity Facefuck Pages (A New And Probably Ongoing Series)

5:13PM Jess McGuire | Ladies and gentlemen, if you’re missing your weekly dose of fiery Idol contestant Tarisai Vushe, then go and add her as a Facebook friend immediately and bask in the warmth of your new interweb relationship with the shouty little minx. We fucking love that she specifies Assemblies Of God as her particular branch of Christianity – take that, Idol marketing department! She is available for friendship by clicking here. And she wants to meet you folk, honest to goodness! THAT’S SO RAVEN! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAIt is nice to know that in this era of Facebook privacy freak outs – Multinationals/Mysterious Government Bodies/God is tracking my online frolicking, oh noes! – that celebrities of every variety, A to Z list, are still prepared to participate in a bit of virtual mateship on social networking sites. Hell, even Sarah Murdoch has a (closed) Facebook profile, which sort of warms our heart a bit in a weird way. Awwwww… pokes. More »

Kiss Going Down… Under

5:12PM Jess McGuire | Rev-heads and music fans are no doubt united in excitement at news legendary musical ensemble Kiss are planning on rocking out with their cocks out at next year’s Grand Prix in Melbourne. The band, made up of singer Gene Simmons, guitarists Paul Stanley and Tommy Thayer, and drummer Eric Singer, will fly to Australia especially for the Grand Prix, which runs from March 13 to 16. Kiss, best known for its trademark face paint and stage outfits, will perform a full concert for race fans on a specially erected stage to close the Formula One race on Sunday, March 16. “Let me see – high octane, roaring horsepower testing the threshold of sound and speed, and then the Formula One Grand Prix. No way we’d miss this,” Stanley said. “We’ll be firing on all cylinders and the audience will need their seatbelts.” No car racing pun left untouched by Paul Stanley, we see. Well done, sir! We interviewed an ex porn star turned wrestling manager last month (no, really) and she told us Gene Simmons is revoltingly sleazy and inappropriate in the flesh, which is probably saying something. We look forward to stalking him around town and finding local ladies willing to publicly attest to the long-tongued lothario’s reputation in the boudoir. More »

YouTube Clip Of The Day

4:44PM Jess McGuire | Let’s have another flashback to the glorious eighties era of Australian rock by sitting back and soaking up the majesty of the following video clip for Icehouse’s ‘Electric Blue’ Nice mullet, Iva Davies! Also, we have become unnaturally obsessed with this track today. That first chord in the chorus is just slaying us for some reason. FUCKING VIVA LA ICEHOUSE! More »

Bec Hewitt Gets Emotional, Bares Bumchin To Media In Gesture Of Support To Kids With Diabetes

4:08PM Jess McGuire | This is the best news.com.au frontpage image we’ve seen in a while. According to the article, it’s a snap of Bec Hewitt breaking down whilst giving a speech as she opened the Westmead Children’s Hospital Diabetes Research Centre. The wife of tennis champ Lleyton Hewitt, whose daughter Mia turns two later this month, became overwhelmed with emotion while opening the Westmead Children’s Hospital Diabetes Research Centre. The soapie star had spent half an hour with children suffering from diabetes prior to giving her talk in front of doctors, hospital staff and the public. Ms Hewitt spoke of the courageous children who have up to six injections a day of insulin to stay alive. While speaking of their bravery, Ms Hewitt began to cry, having to stop several times before carrying on. “It’s quite emotional,” she said. “Having a little one myself.’’ At first glance, we just thought she was still deciding whether to spit or swallow. More »

Amy Winehouse Round-Up: If India Fails, Go To The Newsagent

11:11AM Clem Bastow | Poor old Winegums. With Flake Fielder-Civil now behind bars – and looking likely to stay there for some time – she’s been rattling around old Blighty looking like the inspiration for Dusty Springfield’s I Just Don’t Know What To Do With Myself (only with more tatts and less eyeliner). The “highlight” of this cutting of a particularly sad figure was her popping into a newsagent to pick up a few supplies for her No Good™ husband. The strain appears to be taking its toll on the Rehab singer, who was teary eyed as she stopped into a store near the jail to pick up some supplies for her man. Amy, who wore a checked red shirt, jeans and scuffed ballet flats, was spotted buying a 20-pack of cigarettes and some of his favourite snacks. Some of his favourite snacks! There’s something so poignant about that sad little sentence. Though truth be told, judging by his appearance of late, Flake’s “favourite snacks” probably include babies and the eyeballs of 50 virgins, served in a silver soupdish filled with bloooooood. More »

America’s Favourite G.I. To Be Played By Australian

10:56AM Clem Bastow | US patriots are fuming after word has spread that the best recruitment initiative the army ever invented action hero G.I.Joe is to be played not by a buffed up American hunk, but instead by an Australian ring-in. Continuing his run of overseas success, Sam Worthington is now rumoured to be signing on as the toy soldier in an upcoming blockbuster adaptation (to be followed, at this rate, by Scarlett Johansson starring in My Little Pony: The True Story and Matthew Perry in The Life And Times Of Mr Potatohead). Upsetting Uncle Sam fans is word that Hollywood hunk Mark Wahlberg was originally pencilled in for the role but was bumped for the swoon-worthy Worthington. While production is due to begin on G.I.Joe on February 13, Paramount is reportedly working to amend Worthington’s scheduling overlap with James Cameron’s galactic epic Avatar. “Swoon-worthy”, is he? News to us, but good on him anyway, even if it isn’t true – it’s good to see him getting his name amongst the questionable Hollywood rumourmongering. To celebrate, pop over the jump for our personal favourite thing to do with G.I.Joe, which we hope will be being taken into consideration by the blockbuster’s production team. Don’t understand? Doesn’t matter, just go with it. More »

The Elusive Idol Signings: Did Andrew G Speak Too Soon?

10:46AM Clem Bastow | Remember at the beginning of this year’s Australian Idol finals, Andrew G and James Mathison announced, steely faced, that they had a surprise for the Final 12 – that only one finalist would be signed to Sony BMG this year, the winner? And all the finalists looked a bit miffed that their chance at Ricki Lee/Anthony Callea/Young Divas/Shannon Noll-esque runner-up success had been dashed upon the rocks of big business? Now it seems it was just a ruse, with word that Sony BMG are already wording up third-place-getter Carl Riseley in the hope of giving the nu-swing trumpeter a deal. The navy trumpeter told Confidential he was expecting to meet with label executives who had approached him “straight after the verdict” when he was voted off the starmaker show on Monday night. While publicists for both Idol and Sony/BMG were keen to play down the secret session, Riseley said he was buoyed by the prospect, after hitting a bum note and missing out on a final two spot. “(Sony/BMG) have been really supportive and embraced the idea of Australia having its own jazz guy,” Riseley told Confidential yesterday. Australia’s former “own jazz guy”, James Morrison, was seen furiously voting for Matt and Natalie at his local Telstra dealership. In any case, it’s probably a good thing Carl looks set to be signed, because if his MySpace activity is anything to go by, it looks as though – like Mark Da Costa – this whole business has really hit him hard. He’s gonna BLOW her TRUMPET, and he’s TOTALLY JAZZED to do so! Etc, etc. More »

Anything Those Wacky Uk Papers Can Do, Fairfax Can Do Better

10:39AM Clem Bastow | Yesterday we all had a good laugh at the Mail’s hilarious illustration of a woman’s ‘amazing medical stories’-esque tell-all; well, not to be outdone, today the local papers have lifted their game. To wit, this front-page-news item from Melbourne’s The Age, regarding the topic of “ghost trains” (un-timetabled trains that turn up, express, and spirit passengers away). You may think “What’s all the fuss?” but then, Melbourne is a very public transport-centric city, so The Age has dealt with the piece with the necessary gravity: Yes, that’s right, there is an illustrated ghost saying “Wooooooo!” (that’s seven ‘o’s to be precise) and a skeleton behind the “wheel”. Really, it’s the sort of hard-hitting stuff we’ve come to expect from a multi-Walkley Award-winning broadsheet. More »

Boy George Really Wants To Hurt Me, Sez Male Escort

10:32AM Clem Bastow | Boy “George O’Dowd” George continues his recent run of rotten luck with the law, this time being charged with false imprisonment. It seems George allegedly invited a male prostitute around for a bit of fun, only said fun included chaining him to the wall – and somewhere along the line, the rent boy wasn’t informed that some people actually enjoy chaining each other up for kicks. The flamboyant former member of eighties band Culture Club was charged, released on bail and ordered to attend Thames Magistrates’ Court next week. Scotland Yard confirmed George – real name George O’Dowd – was charged with the false imprisonment of a 28-year-old in Ravey Street, east London, on April 28. Poor Georgie boy – he only last year completed community service in NYC as a street cleaner after his cocaine bust; what will they make him do this time? We’re guessing something less community-minded and more to do with soap and the act of dropping it. More »