Saturday, October 20, 2007
David Copperfield Accused Of Creating The Illusion Of Sexual Consent
8:30AM Defamer Hollywood | Though reports had been circulating about a mysterious FBI raid of the heavily fortified Las Vegas warehouse where celebrity necromancer David Copperfield houses the contract with Satan documenting the exchange of his mortal soul for the infernal magical powers he regularly displays in network television specials, the purpose of the probe had remained unclear. But now Fox News is reporting that the investigation is connected to a rape claim made against Copperfield by a Seattle woman: The woman told Seattle police the magician raped her while she was in the Bahamas, sources said. Because the alleged incident happened abroad and the woman did not report it until she returned to the United States, Seattle authorities turned over the case to the FBI. More »
Hollywood DJs Just As Sick Of Britney Spears’ Crap As You Are
8:15AM Defamer Hollywood | On this morning’s Yo on E! show, DJs Graham Funke and Stone Rokk, frequent masters of record-spinning ceremonies at celebrity-infested local establishments like Area and Les Deux, are induced into talking some smack about the famous clientele to whom the clubs’ buzz-craving owners slavishly cater in hopes of keeping their venues from falling out of favour with Hollywood’s incredibly fickle starfucking crowd. More »
May The Child Never Know From Ken Davitian’s Fetid Taint
8:00AM Defamer Hollywood | Isla Fisher and Sacha Baron Cohen had a bouncing baby…um…baby. (Reports are still sketchy.) We’ve shelved the Borat jokes, so guess it’s time to break out the Bruno ones! Here’s hoping the little one doesn’t grow up to be a Scheißendummführer, and if it’s a boy, winds up with a large schwanzenstück like his father. [People] More »
Hugh Jackman Casino Murder Musical Just As Popular As Anticipated
7:45AM Defamer Hollywood | In a development that will probably surprise no one save the Hugh Jackman producing partner who counselled the star, “You know what we be an inspired career move, Hugh? Let’s get you into a TV project with casinos. But not Vegas – someone’s done that already, I think? Oh, also? There should be SINGING! And a murrrrder!,” the debut of CBS’s conceptually adventurous Viva Laughlin bombed so badly that network corporate overlord Les Moonves may order the execution of everyone involved after its next airing. Reports TV Week on the Nielsen carnage: More »
Are The Globetrotting Pitt-Jolies Doing Their Children A Disservice?
7:30AM Defamer Hollywood | Upon noticing that adoption hobbyists Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie appear to have been afflicted with an acute case of wanderlust, a concerned Page Six contacted “psychotherapist/social worker Puja Hall” for her expert thoughts on how their failure to plant firm roots could lead to developmental problems for their pancultural brood: So far, the Jolie-Pitt clan has lived in New Orleans, Paris, Namibia, Berlin and, most recently, New York, where Maddox attended the prestigious Lycée Francais for just six weeks. Now they’re in L.A., where Jolie is shooting “The Changeling.” Pitt and Jolie are rumoured to have enrolled at least one of the kids at Universal Studio’s child-care >> centre More »
Breaking! Britney Spears Runs Over Paparazzo’s Foot, Murdering Innocent Tube Sock
7:15AM Defamer Hollywood | While trying to capture an image of Britney Spears following an apparent lip-collagen injection so over-the-top that it could make an aging Beverly Hills trophy wife faint dead away in horror, one of TMZ’s fearless photographers bravely sacrificed a pristine tube sock in the commission of his noble duty. More »
Revelations
7:00AM Defamer Hollywood | You know that thing that Jerry Seinfeld does where his voice suddenly gets very loud and high? He may have picked up that trick about invading your earspace when he briefly dabbled in Scientology 30 years ago: “You would just understand that there’s this kind of voice, and then there’s this kind of voice, and then there’s this kind of voice. I wasn’t a natural performer at all, so I learned. I was always a pretty good writer in the beginning, but I really had to learn how to perform. Just a little thing like that, understanding that really helped me on stage to understand how you have to invade the space of the audience a little bit.” [Parade] More »
This Halloween, It’s Your Lindsay In A Box
6:45AM Defamer Hollywood | If you’re not feeling the 2007-era Michael Jackson/Teri Hatcher vibe, may we guide you to American Apparel’s A Hollywood Halloween, featuring costume ideas like Flashdance’s iconic stripper/welder and the Scooby Doo crew, achievable using nothing more than the ubiquitous boutiques’ multicoloured basics. More »
