The Unfolding Mystery Of Chipshop’s Un-Miscarriage

We touched on Kerry “Chipshop” Katona’s pregnancy issues earlier in the week, so we were saddened to read this morning that the ex-Mrs Brian McFadden had suffered a miscarriage – until we switched tabloids and discovered that, apparently, she didn’t miscarry after all.

Confused? So are we (and, we’re guessing, so is Kerry).

Her publicist Max Clifford added: “After further examination it has been revealed that Kerry Katona is still pregnant.

“Kerry went back into hospital for a medical procedure on Tuesday night.

“However, a blood test revealed surprising results – her pregnancy hormones had gone up, not down.

“Kerry was taken for a second scan and was shown her baby’s 3mm heart beat. It has transpired that Kerry is only five weeks pregnant, not seven-eight weeks, which is why the scan was not clear and coupled with bleeding led to her being diagnosed with having had a miscarriage.”

We’d say something about women learning to wait until the three-month mark to announce their pregnancies, but somehow doubt – as much as it pains us to admit it – that Chipshop is fervently browsing Defamer Australia in her hospital bed.

So does this mean that the British press can go back to blaming her troubles on pre-natal “enjoyment” of class A drugs now?

Tune in next week!