Kiefer Sutherland Arrested For DUI, Loses Precious World-Saving Time While Being Processed By LAPD

This morning brings news that will sadden and shock Hollywood (OK, perhaps it won’t exactly shock anyone), as universally beloved, pub-crawling, America-saving rogue Kiefer Sutherland was popped for a DUI last night in West L.A., having reportedly fallen prey to the trap that has claimed untold celebrity lightweights unfit to freshen up his whiskey glass: the illegal U-turn in the sightline of a waiting police cruiser. Says the LAT:

Sutherland, 40, was pulled over about 1:30 a.m. in West Los Angeles near La Cienega and Beverly boulevards after police spotted him making an illegal U-turn, said Officer Ana Aguirre, a spokeswoman for the Los Angeles Police Department

Aguirre said Sutherland failed a field sobriety test and a breathalyser, blowing over the legal blood alcohol limit of 0.08%, after which he was arrested on the misdemeanour charge of driving under the influence.

He was booked at Hollywood station and released about 4 a.m. after posting $US25,000 bail, Aguirre said. Sutherland is scheduled to appear in court Oct. 16, Aguirre said.

We’re sure the inevitable release of Sutherland’s mugshot and the obligatory public statement of remorse will follow soon enough, but while we wait for that sobering, post-DUI progression that we know all too well by now, we’ll allow ourselves a happier thought: that when Kiefer was first pulled over by those cops, he looked the approaching officer right in the eye, and in the gruff, persuasive tones that have convinced far more powerful authority figures to allow him some legal leeway in performing the thankless job of saving our Nation, said, “There’s no time! If I don’t make it to an abandoned warehouse in Van Nuys in fifteen minutes, thousands will die. Do you want that on your conscience, officer?”

• Kiefer Sutherland arrested on DUI charges [LAT]
• Kiefer Sutherland Teaches Unruly Romanians About How To Behave In Church [Defamer]