Thursday, September 13, 2007
Big Brother’s Gordon Dies Mysteriously In Beijing
5:18PM Jess McGuire | Gordon Sloan, best known for being both the first male Big Brother housemate to impress the nation with his “natural gifts” (see also Saxon from Series Three, Dean from Series Five) and flying to Baghdad a couple of years after he left Dreamworld to act as part of a “human shield protest”, died twelve days ago in China under mysterious circumstances.
Says NineMSN -
Sloan, who starred in the first series of the reality show in 2001, died at 1pm (AEST) yesterday at a city hospital. ninemsn understands the 34-year-old architect was admitted on September 1 and was in a coma when he died. Sources told ninemsn drugs were suspected in the death and that Sloan might have taken an overdose or been deliberately drugged by another person.
Known as “Flash Gordon” and “Donkey Boy” during his time in the Big Brother house, Mr Sloan was evicted after 35 days.
…
Reflecting on his time in the house, Sloan told a Big Brother fan site he did not consider himself famous. “Fame is a word given to people who’ve overachieved through natural talent and hard work, and gained the respect and admiration of firstly their peer group, then the world,” he said. “We are not famous or talented. We are popular by exposure so TV networks can sell furniture and breakfast radio gets its sound bites!”
More » 
Amy Winehouse Round-Up: Pointing The Finger
11:38AM Clem Bastow | As we reported yesterday, Amy’s been seen out and about at Kelly Osbourne’s stage debut in Chicago, with a very sore looking finger – in fact, if we do say so ourselves, it looks like it would produce a satisfying amount of pus needs medical attention.
But the best part of all this is that it’s sent the British rags into punning overdrive. From the Mirror:
Amy, digit hurt?
And, from the Sun:
Amy goes to see Chicag-owww
If destiny has a heart, one day we will write punny headlines alongside those brave soldiers…
Anyway, it’s not all shits and giggles in Winegums world, with Amy’s less press happy mother Janis telling Saint Victoria Newton that she no longer recognises her own daughter.
“She’s lost herself. We’re not talking about my Amy. It’s not someone I recognise. She has become her own stage creation.”
Janis goes on to offer some more uplifting quotes, including mentioning that she “knows all about class A drugs” and that there’s basically no point trying to reason with Winegums. Good on ya, mum! More » To Do: Spazzys, Punks And Giggles
11:26AM Anna King | Music Roundup: Welshmen Funeral For A Friend rock the east coast; Evermore at the ANU Bar in Canberra; the Spazzys at Revolver, Melbourne (live on Channel Ten above). Die (of laughter) with a falafel in your hand as Lebanon With Love returns at the Enmore. Stand up spectacularly with Hughesy, Charlie Pickering and Katrina Davidson at the Melbourne Comedy Club. Heads up: Daft Punk (on sale today) and Kings of Leon (on sale Friday) tour nationally. More »
Honey To The C (U.N.T)
11:24AM Clem Bastow | Another of our favourites, Billie Piper, caught the acting bug whilst playing Rose on Doctor Who and is set to continue her reinvention when Secret Diary Of A Call Girl – based on the saucy bestseller – airs later this month in the UK.
Not content to play a high class hooker, Billie will “shock” audiences by pulling out the sweary big guns.
Billie Piper is set to prove she’s a big girl now by using the C-word on TV.
The 24-year-old, who first found fame as a popstar aged 15, is set to shock with her saucy antics in a role as a high-class hooker – and her foul mouth.
Family groups and media watchdogs are suitably upset, but we just love the fact that the Mirror chooses to describe it as Billie being “a big girl now”. Yes, apparently it isn’t getting your period or your license or living alone that shows you’ve grown up, it’s saying “cunt”.
Millions of East End slappers are just now crying tears of joy that their womanhood has finally been confirmed. More » 
British Tabloids Have Their Wicked Way With Demi Moore’s ‘Woman Of A Certain Age’ Lament
11:12AM Clem Bastow | We’ve always liked Demi Moore; we think she’s one of those actresses who – thanks to a few poor choices and the tendency to hang more towards the “celebrity” end of the spectrum rather than the “artist” end… oh yeah, and there was that G.I. Jane “Suck my dick!” moment – has been unfairly classified as Razzie bait. We even like her crazy Brady Bunch-meets-Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice family (pictured above at the Die Hard 4.0 premiere).
So, we were touched by her passionate interview with Red magazine in which she bemoans Hollywood’s treatment of older women. Touched, that is, until we saw what the Mail had done with it – let’s just examine the title, shall we?
‘I’ve spent £226k on plastic surgery but I still can’t get a Hollywood part,’ says Demi
Hmm, we read the story, and re-read it, but all we could find was Demi’s touchingly frank pleading for Hollywood to give older actresses a better deal, and some quotes backing her up from Charlotte Rampling and another of our favourites, Sharon Stone.
So, basically, they invented a quote from Demi based on the industry conjecture regarding her alleged plastic surgery adventures? Kicking goals! More » 
Kylie Has – Wait For It – Another New Hairstyle; Middle East Peace Achieved, Man Walks On Mars
10:56AM Clem Bastow | Look, we’ve been doing this thing for a while now, and we’re pretty hard to shock. We’ve seen it all, from Owen’s misfortune to Howard admitting the IR laws suck – at least, we thought we’d seen it all.
Look, we might as well come out and say it… KYLIE HAS GOTTEN HERSELF ANOTHER NEW HAIRDO.
Any more earth shattering news like this and we’ll have to apply for a floatation tank.
The bright September sunshine reflected the caramel lowlights sprinkled through her layered blonde bob, giving the pop star a subtle ginger look.
Just last week she kept a-head of contestants at a bowling tournament sporting a Sixties sex kitten look which would have made Brigitte Bardot jealous.
“Just last week”! How dizzying it must be to exist in the fast-paced world of Kylie Minogue’s personal hair stylist. We thought living in a war zone or stalking Wall Street would be high stress, but now we know the truth: nowhere is there more shocking news than when Kylie has a new hairdo.
We will now retire from this “journalism” lark and apply for the post-traumatic stress syndrome pension. More » Serving Up Tough Love On Letterman, Dr. Phil Says Britney Spears’ Vagina Isn’t Cute Anymore
9:00AM Defamer Hollywood | On last night’s Late Show, David Letterman invited shouty self-help personality Dr. Phil to speak truth to celebutard power in the wake of the latest Britney Spears meltdown, hoping that the unvarnished words of Oprah’s Favourite Tough-Love-Providing Thing might help Spears and her panty-eschewing peers get their collective acts together. Unsurprisingly, Dr. Phil will countenance no talk about alcohol or drugs’ role as the moral lubricant in desperate starlets’ decisions to share their virtue with the public; these coddled fame-whores, argues the good fake-doctor, know exactly how much vagina they’re going to flash before a single cocktail is poured or rail is blown. Late Show [CBS.com] Previously: The Britney Spears VMA Trainwreck Explained [Defamer] More »
Jon Stewart To Host Oscars, Attempt To Make Everyone Forget About ‘Crash’-Tainted Tragedy of 2006 Awards
8:30AM Defamer Hollywood | It seems that the Academy Awards’ Ellen DeGeneres Era, one marked by frequent tuxedo changes and playful trips into the Kodak Theatre audience for some daytime-talkshow-quality banter with nominees struggling to stay awake during the punishingly long telecast, is over, as it’s been announced that 2006 host Jon Stewart has been reinstalled at the Oscar podium, allowing the comedian to forfeit his membership in Hollywood’s shameful Chris Rock/David Letterman Memorial One-and-Done Club. Though Stewart’s previous turn as emcee of Hollywood Biggest Night was met by both low ratings and mixed critical reaction (there’s really no pleasing Tim Allen) we’re willing to give him another chance: he was profoundly unlucky in drawing the coveted assignment in a year irretrievably tainted by a Crash Best Picture win, and can’t be blamed for the mass rioting that immediately followed the hand-over of Paul Haggis’ second statuette of the cursed ceremony, an uprising that resulted in the tragic burning to the ground of the Kodak amidst chants of “Worst! Oscars! Ever!” With Oscar’s home completely rebuilt and the unlikelihood that we’ll experience another apocalypse-harkening upset, Stewart’s return should be a triumphant one that helps to erase the painful memories of the unfortuante events of that March 2006 evening. Academy to Invite Jon Stewart Back as Oscar Host [NY Times] Jon Stewart to return as Oscar host [AP] More »
