Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Amy Winehouse Watch: Still Getting Pocket Money From Mum, We Should Be So Lucky
2:13PM Clem Bastow | After the news that Winegums’ dad Mitch was trying to gain control of Amy’s “drug money” (i.e. her earnings from the singing career that’s so easy to forget about) comes today’s news that Amy’s ma has restricted Amy’s ‘pocket money’ to a paltry 300 per week. We’re sure an album of Simple Plan-esque parental-hatred emo songs is in the works.
But the pharmacist, from Barnet, north London, said: “Amy is playing Russian roulette with her health and musical gift.
“She’s lost herself. We’re not talking about my Amy. It’s not someone I recognise. She has become her own stage creation.”
It seems Amy is also suffering from a swollen finger, which the Mail helpfully suggests could be infected, “raising fears over drug-addict Amy’s health”. Mmm… *our best Anna Coren slow head shake*
We’re also delighted that the Mail is so enjoying the ever expanding epic of Winegums that they’ve added a superfluous “scroll down for more” at the base of the story, where there’s actually nothing left to scroll down for:
Presumably that was added just in case they need to update it – or perhaps this is symbolic of the fact that the Winegums saga WILL NEVER END.
We’re just sayin’ is all. More » 
The Mid-Morning Wrap Up
10:58AM Anna King | While you were sleeping: Behind the lip-synced trainwreck: Britney revealed as Britney’s Achilles heel. Getting to know the Leave Britney Alone Guy. Kathy Griffin, D-lister, to Jesus, THE SAVIOUR: Suck it, bitch! It’s still good: Barely legal Idol cutie Matt Corby is keen to be robbed from the cradle. Lots of people self-destructed in sensational so-bad-it’s-too-good-to-look away performances BB (Before Britney). Winegums Watch is back! More »
“Devastating News For Female Idol Fans Everywhere”
10:42AM Clem Bastow | In a bit of press hyperbole the likes of which have not been seen since we were advised that Kate De Araugo fans would “literally die” if they missed her gig, Australian Idol’s Jacob Butler has announced that his ‘ITALIAN GIRLS DO IT BETTER’ t-shirt actually means something – yes, sorry girls, he’s off the market.
In devastating news for female Idol fans everywhere, Butler this week revealed he’s been secretly dating Channel Ten publicist Paula Lucarelli for a year.
The pair met on the set of The X Factor in 2005, but their relationship didn’t hit the right notes until Butler moved to Melbourne last year.
“Devastating”! Were we snoozing when Jacob “Failed Musos Become Music Journalists” Butler became this year’s choice Idol hottie? Matt Corby, Mark Da Costa, Daniel Mifsud and Carl Riseley must be breathing a collective sigh of relief that Jacob has evidently swooped in to take over their pin-up duties. More » 
“Our” Sarah With Child; Ahnuld Sends Congratulations Via Signed Copy Of ‘Kindergarten Cop’
10:27AM Clem Bastow | Hollywood starlet and sometime-Australian Sarah Wynter has become the latest local girl to announce a bun in the oven after Naomi Watts’ recent spawning and Isla Fisher’s upcoming bub.
Congratulations to the Lisa Ho fan and her feller!
Wynter’s Hollywood manager David Fleming said the actress and her magazine publisher husband Dan Peres were ecstatic about the impending arrival early next year.
“Sarah and Dan are very happy to confirm the good news,” he told News Limited today.
Wynter, who sprang to fame starring opposite Arnold Schwarzenegger in The 6th Day in 2000 and playing Kiefer Sutherland’s love interest in television hit 24, is currently in New York rehearsing for her starring role in Broadway play The Rise of Dorothy Hale, which opens in two weeks.
We left that last paragraph in there in case you’ve forgotten just who Sarah Wynter actually is. Still, congrats! More » 
Mad Chinese Haxx0rs Bring Da Uber Pwnage To Australian Computer N00bs
10:17AM Clem Bastow | We love nothing more than a bit of “cyber terror” fear-mongering, so we offer hearty thanks to the News Ltd team this morning for bringing us some truly epic lulz on the topic of Chinese “hackers” breaking into New Zealand and Australian government computers via t3h int3rw3b5.
The Howard Government yesterday would neither confirm nor deny that its agencies, including the Defence Department, had been subject to cyber attack from China, but government sources acknowledge that thwarting such assaults is a continuous challenge.
“It’s a serious problem, it’s ongoing and it’s real,” one senior government source said.
Just re-read that “senior government source” quote, but do it out loud, and in the Hollywood Blockbuster Trailer Voiceover. With quotes like that coming from high up within the governments, not to mention recent LULZ including a 16-year-old “hacking” the new Govt porn filters, we suspect the government’s issues are less about hackers, but more of the PEBKAC variety. More » This Is Exactly How Defamer Australia Feels About The Whole Britney Spears Thing.
10:02AM Jess McGuire | More » 
Jenna Jameson Coming, Not Necessarily Cumming, To Australia
10:01AM Clem Bastow | Porn queen and mistress of reinvention Jenna Jameson – she who looks increasingly like Daisy Duck with every passing day – is to visit our shores after becoming ex-pat designer Aurelio “Ray” Costarella’s biggest fan.
Jameson said she fell for the designs six months ago while doing a magazine shoot in an Aurelio Costarella gown.
“I had no idea who had designed it but I was like ‘I want this dress’,” she said. “I called him and I was like, listen: ‘I love your stuff, please, please dress me and he was very into it – so here I am’.” 
Having A Family With You Makes Me So Glad, I Know I’ll Never Get Sad – Unless Channel 7 Start Digging Around In My Charitable Past, That Would Be Bad
9:53AM Clem Bastow | Rebecca Hewitt (nee Bec Cartwright) has certainly fallen from her former Channel 7 pedestal as Home & Away sweetheart and Dancing With The Stars champ, with Today Tonight “investigating” just how (monetarily) involved the Hewitts were in assisting AIDS-affected children in Cambodia.
“We will be involved from scratch, starting off with the land, the building and then feeding the kids. It will be unreal,” Bec said in February, 2005.
The Hope for Children home is now up and running, but – without the approval of the Hewitts – TT has set out to find if the celebrity couple did properly oversee the project with the AIDS Trust of Australia.
This is TT we’re talking about, so chances are there won’t actually be any dirty laundry aired besides conjecture and some shaky camera-work – and the AIDS Trust has already publicly supported the Hewitts’ efforts – but either way we’re tipping on a “Bec Hewitt’s AIDS Orphan Tragedy” cover story in Women’s Day very, very soon. More » 
Is It Actually Possible? Are We Facing The Prospect Of A Year Without Moronic Bogans On Our TV Screens?
9:34AM Jess McGuire | Unlikely, as long as televised footy matches of Collingwood games still feature shots of the supporters (we say this with extreme love), but we are indeed looking down the barrel of a Big Brother-less 2008.
Big Brother may not return to television screens next year, as television executives and producers remain in negotiations over the show’s future.
During this year’s finale show, host Gretel Killeen said the show had been confirmed to reappear on Network Ten in 2008.
But less than two months later that claim looks increasingly uncertain.
During a time that should be occupied with plans for the next season, the show has yet to be confirmed by Network Ten as part of the 2008 line-up.
We’re finding it hard to even remember what Channel Ten programming was like before the crazy days in 2000 when we were introduced to the likes of Blair, Ben and Sara-Marie during the first season of Big Brother. Was there even television before then? Did we go out at night? What happened on Sunday evenings? We didn’t read books or spend quality time with family members or anything weird like that… did we?
At least one high profile cast member, involved in pivotal roles on the program in the past, was understood to be considering other projects for next year.
Another was said to have told friends that a return to the show was not on the cards.
Our bet is that the first ‘high profile’ cast member is Bree, and the second is Ryan Fitzy/Fryzie Fitzgerald. In any case, you know Mike Goldman isn’t the protagonist in either scenario. We’ve no doubt that news of the show’s cancellation would lead to him rocking back and forth in a corner, quietly weeping, whilst texting “Mikey G” to 199 2SAVE repeatedly.
Eventually he’d get it together enough to finally leave the house, but even then it’d only be to hit the Gold Coast bars where he’d try to impress roving gangs of blonde-haired scrawny girls wearing midriff tops featuring feisty slogans sprawled across the chest area by slamming his last $50 down on the bar and screaming “WELCOME TO FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE!”. And each night would see him once again leaving the nightclub heavy hearted after yet another youthful lass has stared at him blankly for a few minutes before finally asking “You, like, totally look familiar. Were you, like, my primary school teacher or something? Why are you, like, out? That’s gross…”.
Poor Mike-Goldman-in-our-overly-dramatic-dream-sequence :(
You never know. Perhaps Big Brother’ll just go on hiatus until 2009. And maybe a year off will do everyone involved in the production the world of good. The idea of a relaxed Gretel fronting a program that doesn’t just feature sixteen half-cut idiots who pretty much spend their days topping up their tan – and their nights donning fancy dress costumes and pashing each other – is sort of appealing. More » 
