Saturday, September 8, 2007
Week In Review: When A Howard Loves A Larry
9:00AM Defamer Hollywood | Were Howard K. Stern and Larry Birkhead caught on tape in a “compromising, intimate position?” We’d rather not think about it. When Bill Murray explains drunken Swedish golf cart joyriding, he makes it seem so darn logical. Bionic Woman to be built better, stronger, faster by some other showrunner. Tobey Maguire is excited to bring Robotech, about a giant dance palace for robots, to the big screen. Jerry Lewis begs illiterate faggos‘ forgiveness. Brad Pitt is nearly hugged to death by a crazed, touchy-feely fan. Don’t worry, Ryan. You’ll be swell. You’ll be great. Fred Thompson, star of Law & Order and many crappy movies, is running for president. Just don’t expect Hollywood to care. Jenna Fischer switches her MySpace relationship status to single. WachowskiWatch: Lana still Larry. Chinese Theatre folk comment on Whoopi’s first day at The View. More »
Vanessa Hudgens (And Her Army of Reps) Sorry About Those Leaked Nudie Pics
8:45AM Defamer Hollywood | Vanessa Hudgens, the once-wholesome High School Musical star whose naked body has now been viewed by untold millions of (warning: link NSFW) depraved perverts on the internet, has just released a statement apologising for posing for the racy photographs that have Walt Disney’s cryogenically frozen head spinning in its freezer. From ABC News: More »
Rosie O’Donnell Shocks World By Angrily Complaining About Current Project On Blog
8:30AM Defamer Hollywood | Rosie O’Donnell’s next project, a memoir about the trials and tribulations of a reluctant TV personality called Celebrity Detox, has inadvertently become the source of much hand-wringing and stress for the Elisabeth Hasselbeck-targeting headshot vandal. O’Donnell has thus returned to the one true friend she can rely on to never tire of her constant, eardrum-rupturing complaining – her blog – and vented her frustrations upon its virtual pages: O’Donnell wrote on her blog, that she received a copy of her new book (due in stores on Oct. 2), “Celebrity Detox (The Fame Game),” and was shocked by notes on the sleeve of the hardcover. More »
Short Ends: On Forgiveness, Death Wishes, And Horny Grandparents
8:00AM Defamer Hollywood | Maybe we spoke too soon about Vanessa Hudgens’ fans forgiving her for those nudie pics. Mercifully, new graphic-fucking-positive HBO drama Tell Me You Love Me will go easy on the septuagenarian ugly-bumping: “Explicit scenes of young, lithe bodies having it in many places and in all manners, including solo, are plentiful in the first few episodes. Yet when it comes to a white-haired, elderly couple, the camera looks away, sparing viewers the shock of seeing sagging bellies and wrinkled limbs in the throes of carnal bliss.” Jodie Foster says that The Brave One is more than just Death Wish. It’s Death Wish with a chick. Aliens are keeping an eye on the president. Tonight’s your last chance to see the Golden Girls go wild. More »Britney Spears At the VMAs: Looking Back, Looking Forward
6:00AM Defamer Hollywood | We know that we’ve already dismissively noted in passing the news of onetime pop star Britney Spears’ triumphant return to the VMAs, but this AP video reminds us why the announcement was a moment of incredible cultural import. Somehow, buffeted by constant reports of ill-advised infant tooth-whitening, topless hot-tub hostage-taking, and poop-marred photo shoots, we’d completely forgotten about her impressive VMA performances of the past: the flesh-coloured underthings, the albino reptiles, the ceremonial passing-of-the-calculated-provocation-torch sealed with a lesbian-lite kiss, all of it. More »
Tobey Maguire Wants A Piece Of The Giant Fucking Robots Action
5:30AM Defamer Hollywood | With Transformers having shattered all kinds of non-sequel box office records, Voltron in the development pipeline, and Gobots: The Movie awaiting the hedge fund capital infusion that will allow it to expand into a feature-length production, it’s obvious that Hollywood is suffering from a serious case of robofever – and, as the THR notes today, the disease is worsening: Warner Bros. and Spider-Man star/occasionally portly poker enthusiast/burgeoning producer Tobey Maguire are getting into the Giant Fucking Robots business, announcing that they’re teaming up to bring Robotech, yet another 1980s cartoon series involving oversized automatons and the human freedom fighters who love them, to your local multiplex: “We are very excited to bring ‘Robotech’ to the big screen,” Maguire said. “There is a rich mythology that will be a great foundation for a sophisticated, smart and entertaining film.” [...] More »
Nip Slip Corner
5:00AM Defamer Hollywood | Not that you’ve never seen Christina Ricci’s nipples before, but here’s your latest chance to reacquaint yourself with one of her runaway areolas. [Egotastic] More »
Reasons Jessica Alba Might Not Have Many Female Friends
4:30AM Defamer Hollywood | Asked by People for the secret to her much coveted physique, Good Luck Chuck star Jessica Alba admitted her busy schedule has prevented her from doing any actual exercise for months. Instead, the Teen Choice Awards “favourite female hottie” winner attributes her figure to yoga, and “drinking a lot of water.” Pear-shapped and muffin-topped women everywhere reacted to the news in one of two ways: Either by sending telepathic fat-waves towards the hateful Alba, or by taking her advice to heart, and diving into a clumsy approximation of a “downward dog” they once saw Julia Roberts demonstrate on Oprah, before toasting their new bodies with a refreshing bottle of high fructose corn syrup fortified Pepsi WaterMax. Jessica Alba ‘Hasn’t Worked Out In Months’ [People] More »
‘Creative Differences’ End NBC’s Romance With ‘Bionic Woman’ Showrunner
4:00AM Defamer Hollywood | The set of much-buzzed-about new NBC series Bionic Woman – eagerly anticipated by late-70s television nostalgists, the indestructible-heroine-loving Heroes set, and fanboys drooling over their weekly primetime appointment with star Michelle Ryan’s six million dollar rack alike – may be officially troubled™ – Var reports that “creative differences” (not the Mandy Patinkin kind, we’ll assume) have forced the network to part ways with showrunner Glen Morgan, and discusses rumours that the series might be taking a “getting its shit together” hiatus: There had been word around town that “Bionic” was also shutting down production, but an NBC rep said that isn’t the case. However, industry insiders believe it’s possible the show – which is now in production on its fifth episode – still might take a break for a while in order to give the writers a chance to focus on refining the show’s directions. More »
