Edging closer and closer to her June 5th date with incarceration with each passing minute (at least that's our generally understanding regarding the concept of time), Paris Hilton is now attempting to outsmart the system and somehow escape the big house. First stop? MySpazz, of course!

The 26-year-old was ordered by a Los Angeles judge on Friday to report to a county jail by June 5 to serve a 45-day sentence for violating the terms of her probation in an alcohol-related reckless driving case.

Hilton's plea, on her MySpace website, came as her lawyers filed a notice with the court indicating their intent to appeal.

The hotel heiress urged fans to join her in a desperate plea to California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to keep her out of jail.

She wrote on her blog: "My friend Joshua started this petition, please help and sihn (sic) it. i LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!"

Have literacy programs been established in American prisons?

The petition she's asking people to 'sihn' is quite wonderful - check it out.

 

The petition reads: "Paris Whitney Hilton is an American celebrity and socialite. She is an heiress to a share of the Hilton Hotel fortune, as well as to the real estate fortune of her father Richard Hilton. She provides hope for young people all over the US and the world. She provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives."

"We, the American public who support Paris, are shocked, dismayed and appalled by how Paris has been the person to be used as an example that Drunk Driving is wrong...

"This petition is to ask Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to pardon Paris Hilton for her mistake. Please allow her to her return to her career and life."

She provides hope for young people all over the US and the world? Possibly. We're not sure how many teenage girls are following Paris' exploits closely and thinking "If I work hard enough, maybe - just maybe - I could suddenly morph into a spoiled heiress with a penchant for drugs, cock and idiocy!" but what do we know? We don't get how "the kids" are into Jared Leto's shitful musical offerings, but they are.

And once you're done signing Paris' petition for freedom - and we're sure you are gonna sign it, as you people NEED her beauty and excitement in your mundane lives - take a moment to get behind the following equally important cause and show your support for Amanda and Kylie.

Okay we are like really good friends...and we just want to be able to do what we want with our own hair....dying it isnt even bad! and a few peircings , wuts the harm, there is none! we should so be allowed to do what we want with oursleves...so plz sign this petition and tell us u agree. we should so be allowed to.

Yes, we beg of you. Please help Amanda and Kylie duy their hair and get wutever pericings they want.

Tags: au | cops & courts | paris hilton