Thursday, May 31, 2007
Enrique Iglesias Will Woo You With Gay Anthems
7:40PM Jess McGuire | Newly single Enrique Iglesias (yes, he and Anna Kournikova have called it a day… hopefully the break up wasn’t related to him admitting he has a tiny cock) likes to get down and dirty with the ladies whilst listening to… the Village People? Erm, yes.
Enrique revealed his favourite band is Village People – and he enjoys listening to Macho Man while making love.
Lyrics for the camp group’s sexy classic include: “Body, wanna feel my body? Body, such a thrill my body/Body, wanna touch my body?/Body, it’s too much my body/Check it out my body, body.”
We’d like to take a moment to appreciate the fine lyrics of Macho Man, stirring words we (unbelievably) had never noticed featured in the tune.
He said: “Village People are one of my favourite bands.
It’s not a joke! I’m surprised you think it’s a joke.
“I like their originality. I really do.”
And while he chose Marvin Gaye, Josh Groban or even Enigma as mood music to make love to, when asked if he also adds the Village People to the list, he said: “Yes, to Macho Man.”
Later this month Enrique, who scored a UK No.1 with Hero in 2001, is back with a new album Insomniac and single Do You Know? (The Ping Pong Song).
There is something kind of brilliant and tragic about Enrique’s new single having a title like ‘Do You Know? (The Ping Pong Song)’. Has anyone actually heard it?
UPDATE: Apparently he and Anna have not split up, it was just a merry jape! We’re kinda starting to like his pisstaking, even if his back catalogue does make us feel like rubbing our face against a cheese grater until we hit bone. More » 
We Heart Teen Fit Camp
7:31PM Jess McGuire | Channel Ten debuted their new reality television series Teen Fit Camp this evening, and Defamer Australia made a special effort to watch it. Also, we enjoy relaxing on Thursday nights by quietly revelling in the Unresolved Sexual Tension between Elliott and Olivia on Law & Order: SVU which kicks off at 8.30pm so it wasn’t too hard getting to the telly an hour early to check out the show we’d read so much about.
Our conclusion? We surprised ourselves by really quite enjoying it! It doesn’t seem to be all that exploitive (something we suspect won’t be able to be said about the British equivalent of the concept Fat Kids Can’t Hunt) and the producers have very cleverly picked teenagers who will undoubtedly look like a million bucks once they reach their goal weight.
The cast of characters includes Gemma, the beautiful (yes, beautiful as she is right now) sixteen year old who would love nothing more than a boyfriend. Not that she’s allowed to have one while she’s at Teen Fit Camp – it’s one of the rules. Regardless, she was quickly part of a romantic triangle involving Aussie boy Tom who began telling her he loved her in what seemed to be minutes (it was unrequited), while she in turn directed her attentions to an American lad at the camp called Josh. The show also features a cousin of Casey ‘Not The Gay Porn Star’ Donovan, the former Australian Idol winner who happens to be currently training with Guy Leech in order battle her own weight problem.
Look, normally we prefer to digest our required dosage of teenage angst and woe the way God intend – reading barely literate MySpace blog entries in flashing pink text – but the show won us over this evening.
Of course, we are notoriously fickle and will probably begin obsessing about Deal Or No Deal again within days, totally forgetting the trials and tribulations of overweight Australian adolescents stuck in the middle of the woods somewhere in North America. We’ll keep you posted.
PS: We are also kind of fascinated with the fact Tom has told two girls that he loves them during a one week period. And been dumped by both of them, poor love. More » 
Do It Yourself Online Mills & Boon Shenanigans
6:56PM Jess McGuire | Yesterday we received a charming email informing us of the existence of a website which allows users to contribute to an ongoing online Mills & Boon novel.
Check it out here.
Remember when you were a kid and you used to play that ‘campfire’ game where you had to make up a story, line by line? One person would start, then the next would start a new sentence…and so on…and so on…
Well, we’re adults now and this is a NEW, TECHNOLOGICAL WORLD. So we’re taking the old campfire game and turning it digital. And what other way to do it than with the classic, literary genre of MILLS AND BOON.
Basically, the premise is this – you log into the site. You read the latest entry. Then you add your own. Finally we will have our very own masterpiece which will will send off to Avon and attempt to get published. And then we will be rich, godammit!! RICH!!!!
Sounds intriguing. There are two stories which folk can choose to participate in – ‘The Siren’s Seduction’ which claims to be ‘a saucy medical romance set amidst the harsh outback plains of the Queensland bush’ (soon to be made into a movie with Baz Luhrmann?), and ‘Workplace Relations’ which is deliciously described as ‘a sultry office romance sure to steam up computer screens and cubicles across the world’.
We hope Alan Fletcher continues with his ‘workplace relations’ themed career direction and stars in the made for TV version of the latter. More » Channel Seven Honcho Sentenced To Weekend Detention
6:56PM Jess McGuire | The man recently described to us as “one of the most powerful people in news in Australia”, Channel Seven’s Peter Meakin, has just been sentenced to 14 months periodic detention for drink driving.
The Seven Network’s head of news and current affairs, Peter Meakin, has been sentenced to at least 14 months periodic detention for drink driving and dangerous driving.
Meakin, 64, was today also banned from driving for eight years.
The TV news chief, who faces spending his weekends in prison, immediately lodged an appeal.
The offences occurred at North Narrabeen in Sydney on October 4 last year, as Meakin was driving his four-wheel-drive BMW home to Clareville after drinking two bourbons at work.
Meakin accelerated past a random breath testing site in a bid to avoid being pulled over, forcing two police officers off the road, Manly Local Court was told.
He was arrested after a police pursuit and returned a blood alcohol reading of 0.10, twice the legal limit.
Meakin, who has twice been caught drink driving in the past, pleaded guilty to mid-range drink driving.
Not only slightly shickered, but also cocky enough to attempt to out-run the police? Uh-oh. No doubt rival Channel Nine’s A Current Affair team will be having celebratory after work drinks this evening (and arranging for a lot of cabfares).
As one of our associates quipped, “Obviously the judge isn’t a big fan of Today Tonight”.
Not surprisingly, Meakin’s lawyer isn’t happy with what he feels is a harsh sentence.
Mr Boulten earlier said his client would “not do it easy in jail” and it was unthinkable “for somebody to hold a job like he has from jail”.
Who actually does do it easy in jail, though? And has time in the clink ever actually benefited anyone career-wise? Mark ‘Chopper’ Read being the obvious exception… More » 
Dr Karl Provides The Voice For The Government’s Workplace Information Hotline
6:56PM Jess McGuire | Alan Fletcher, “the federal vice president of the Media Entertainment and Arts Alliance, the union which represents Australian actors, journalists and other cultural workers”, and perhaps most importantly, the man who plays Dr Karl Kennedy on Neighbours, has lent his voice to radio and television commercials which plug the Howard Government’s new workplace relations infoline.
Says The Age –
Mr Fletcher, a former Victorian president of the union who also plays Dr Karl Kennedy on Neighbours, said as a professional voice-over artist he read commercials for many products and services.
“The Workplace Relations ad appeared to me to be a non-political commercial that advertised changes to the law and how to get information about those changes,” he said in the statement.
“The ad offered no endorsement of government policy on Workplace Relations and, as such, did not conflict with my personal principles,” he added.
Hmmm. We’re loathe to use the term “sell-out” and we get what he’s saying about how the wording of the ad itself doesn’t exactly endorse government policy, but surely he can see why people might think it’s a bit suss for him to be doing the voice-over? A struggling lefty actor who goes against his personal ideals in order to pay the rent by doing a similar advertisment is one thing, but this isn’t quite the same when you consider Alan Fletcher’s public profile.
Still, we love how Alan is clearly trying to say “Hey, it’s just a job! I’m not into it personally!” and then Joe Hockey’s spokesman comes out with…
“We have no objection to people being members of a union, and appreciate his whole-hearted endorsement of the government’s workplace industrial relations reforms.”
Heh. Whole-hearted endorsement of the government’s workplace industrial relations reforms might be stretching it a bit, lads. More » 
Paris Hilton And Future Cellmate Dreading Her Arrival In Equal Measures
12:23PM Defamer Hollywood | Time is quickly running out for Paris Hilton, who has until June 5 to turn herself into authorities, relinquishing all the luxurious little conveniences from her vastly privileged life – the expensive handbags, the fine automobiles, the tree-dwelling marsupials – in exchange for a standard-issue orange jumper and anonymous prisoner number. Despite her best efforts to make the most of her last days of freedom (nothing really quite makes you feel alive like plunking down an AmEx Black card on a Dior boutique counter and announcing to the grovelling sales staff, “I need you to sell me things. Now!”), the looming specter of a summer behind bars seems to have gotten the better of the typically upbeat socialite. From People.com: “Paris hasn’t been eating at all and her parents and friends are beyond worried about her,” the source says. “She breaks down crying a lot because she just can’t deal with the reality and the pressure of everything that is happening.” [...] But the fact is, “She’s been having such a tough time with it all despite her going out with friends and going shopping,” the source says. “She just does that to keep her mind off things and to try and stay as normal as possible right now.” More »
The Chosen One’s Modest First Birthday Party
12:13PM Defamer Hollywood | It’s hard to believe, but an entire year has passed since Angelina Jolie, swollen with her first biological offspring at the finest resort in Namibia, rang the delicate bell that summoned down from Heaven the host of seraphim midwives who would gently escort through her blessed birth canal the Chosen infant widely expected to usher in an era of worldwide peace and prosperity. Since those earliest, auspicious moments, however, Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt’s messianic career has to be seen as a resounding disappointment, with not a single miracle credited to the tyke over the last twelve months, a letdown that quickly drove mother Angelina to the orphanages of Vietnam to snatch up the first adorable urchin to tug at the hem of her khakis. More »
Lindsay Lohan: The Heartbreaking Slideshow
12:10PM Defamer Hollywood | With Lindsay Lohan safely chained to a solid-gold radiator at Promises Malibu and the orderlies assigned to her care instructed never to spike her delicious wheatgrass-and-ipecac detox smoothies with Bacardi, no matter how extravagant the bribe offered, all Lohan coverage for the next 28 or so days will probably be limited to recaps of the events leading up to this weekend’s spectacular flameout or forward-looking attempts to discern What It All Means for Other Substance-Abusing Starlets Who’d Kill For This Kind of Media Attention, Even If They Have To Drunkenly Mow Down A Valet at Hyde To Get It.
Actor You Long Believed To Be Gay Is Confirmed As Gay
11:24AM Defamer Hollywood | In a shocking revelation that is sure to awaken feelings you haven’t experienced since you learned that guy who played Doogie Howser is sexually attracted to men, the AfterElton blog exclusively confirms that Frasier’s gay-seeming brother is, in fact, gay. The tip off (besides an 11-year run convincingly portraying a character who found it nearly impossible to consummate a heterosexual relationship with the help) was a passing reference to Hyde Pierce “partner” Brian Hargrove in a recent AP story about the actor’s successful career on Broadway, prompting AfterElton to contact his rep for clarification that the individual mentioned was a life-partner partner, and not some other variety of strictly platonic creative collaborator, like the guy who runs Hugh Jackman’s production company. Now that this matter is out in the open, we trust that the media will respect Hyde Pierce’s privacy, recognising that like trailblazing Grey’s Anatomy star T.R. Knight, being gay isn’t the most interesting thing about him, and not begin hassling him about posing with his favorite pet on the cover of the The Advocate. Exclusive: David Hyde Pierce is officially out [AfterElton.com] ‘Frasier’ brother finds home on stage [CNN.com] More »
