6:58PM Jess McGuire | Only minutes to go before Defamer Australia begins live blogging the launch of the 2007 season of Big Brother. We’re excited. Are you? Please bear in mind that the impressive speed at which we shall be laying the textual smackdown will mean there could be a few typos, a severe lack of photos and… well, the jokes could be better.
7.02pm - Well, here’s our first shock of the season. Gretel doesn’t look like she’s rolled around in some super-glue and ricocheted her way through a costume shop.
7.05pm – Gretel tells us that there are two existing relationships between people in the house. “Only one housemate knows about the relationships… and that housemate doesn’t know that they know it.” Feel free to use that as the Gold Coast equivalent of “If a tree falls in a wood…” if you ever need your head emptied. It’s worked a treat for us.
7.07pm - We meet new housemate
Hayley. She used to be a bodybuilder and is a bit Flick Scully-esque, but Gretel’s mad cans seem too distracting for us to make many notes on Hayley. Sorry.
7.08pm - “Steadycam Steve” and Gretel guide us through the house. This year the house appears less to be a crack addled Freedom furniture designer’s wet dream. Instead, it’s Al Gore’s wet dream. Excellent.
7.13pm – Defamer Australia decides that updating every few minutes will officially lead to brain explosion. Updates less regular from here on in, kids.
7.18pm - Hayley enters the house and indulges in the stock standard First Housemate Wandering Around The House Soliloquy. Irritating to the extreme. We then meet
TJ - she’s spent a lot of time “banging heads” and is apparently boy crazy.
Third housemate is a Mormon named
Rebecca. She’s never had a drink but there’s a twinkle in her eye which leads us to think she could go off the rails. Huzzah. Gretel asks her how she’s feeling – “It’s sort of like I’ve had an explosion on the inside”. Oh bless her. That’s called an orgasm, Rebecca, and we’re not sure you want to be with Gretel Killeen for your first.
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